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What do you do if you want to flog a story and there's no real news being made? If you're Olby, you run with rumors and speculation. Anything to make the CIA leak the top story of the day. Actual quotes from just the first two minutes of the show:
But never let it be said that Countdown doesn't adhere to solid journalistic practices:
We've confirmed separately that there was a Cheney quits rumor...
On OlbyPlanet, that's called having two sources:
1. There was a rumor.
2. "We" confirmed there was a rumor.
Hey, that's close enough for MSNBC. Unfortunately, Dana Milbank didn't play along and gave the story the horse laugh. But Keith wasn't about to give up. The moonbat lefty websites are always a good source of juicy propaganda, so Olby once again went back to that well:
The website RawStory says the person who's supposedly been flipped on this occasion is John Hannah...
Raw Story? Raw Story?!? The "editor" of Raw Story is the guy who brags that he has the "proof" that Bush was AWOL from the National Guard (apparently unaware that there is no such thing as AWOL from the Guard), and lists among the site's great journalistic achievements:
the outing of Congressman David Dreier and the relevation [sic] conservative newspapers in his home district participated in a deliberate effort to keep Dreier's sexuality out of their pages
Undoubtedly, Olby is the only host of a national "news" hour that would admit to, let alone brag about, relying on a source of this caliber. Imagine what would happen if Bill O'Reilly claimed he got a story from the Operation Rescue Gazette? But we digress. Keith's breathless reporting of Raw Story's latest "relevation" made it sound like Big News, but that old wet blanket Milbank threw cold water on this one too:
The John Hanna rumor has been around for months. It's been circulating around blogs for months.... Nobody has any confirmation that it's true.
Harriet Miers was the next victim to appear in KO's sights. The shock here was seeing Sen Grassley (R) appear on screen. Looks like Keith's producers are making him do stuff against his will again. Grassley has not endorsed Miers, so KO has still managed to avoid interviewing any supporters of the nominee. And Olby did make this one of the shortest interview segments we've ever seen on the Hour of Spin.
Keith then picked up an item that echoed around moonbat circles such as Daily Kos and Think Progress. Poor Ed Schultz, the lefty talk-show host, is not going to have his program aired on Armed Forces Radio as he thought. (To be precise, it didn't start on Monday because they needed approval from Pentagon honcho Larry DiRita and he is still out of the country, but that didn't exactly make it into KO's piece.)
For Schultz, and therefore for Olby, this was naked political payback because last week Schultz criticized the Pentagon. Like he hasn't done that before. Keith gave him a powder puff interview, but then balanced it by talking to a Pentagon spokesman. Hah! Fooled you! Or not. The day Olby balances any leftist with the other side of the story is the day the sun rises in the west.
The premier Olbsession resurfaced in his "top three newsmakers" segment where he referenced a Bill O'Reilly interview in Newsday:
And speaking of a big piece of poop, #1: Bill O'Reilly.
The Laughing Stagehand cackled at that one. But wait, there's more. Since O'Reilly mentioned that a few years hence he might retire, Keith yelled "We Won!" Then he started sissy-prancing around his desk, throwing papers every which way, screaming "Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy!". The emergency desk at Bellevue immediately dispatched an ambulance.