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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
"Rush to Judgment"
Olby began The Hour of Spin with Gallup polls about Iraq. Public opinion is the arbiter of all you know, except for those pesky cable news ratings. Craig Crawford showed up within moments to chuckle and giggle about how the President really doesn't care about polls. Olbermann's Brain seemed to think a big turnout would help Democrats. We are astonished by his unending insights.
Of course Olby had to bring up the "war against the media", you know, the one where's it's wrong to criticize writers or broadcasters unless it's Krazy Keith doing the attacking. Brain called it classic "attack the messenger", plugging his own book at the same time.
KO said the Bush White House is "escalating its war against the media to near-nuclear proportions". This sounds serious! What did they do now? We waited and listened, and waited and listened, but Keith never told us! The only example he gave was Tony Snow saying he wouldn't revoke the NY Times press credentials.
OK, so maybe we're missing something here, but how is that a near-nuclear assault on the media by the White House? You can count Krazy's klaim as reckless hyperbole, or just another Olbermann lie. Take your pick. Meanwhile, Mitchell showed up to give the leftist view of all this, and Keith resurrected one of his favorite tricks, painting whatever happens as a boneheaded bad move for the Bush administration:
Did the White House just buy itself two and a half years of the media working overtime to catch it in anything because...of this reaction, this vitriol?
Mitchell complained that not enough people have rallied to the defense of the Times, and boasted that they did not "rush to judgment" about the story. Neither he nor the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann mentioned any of the prominent Democrats who lobbied the Times against publishing the article (John Murtha, Joe Biden, etc). That's the kind of new that never makes it onto Countdown. Mitchell found a way to drag Katrina into the discussion, thereby earning himself a return trip to The Hour of Spin.
Olby bellowed the phrase "comedian Rush Limbaugh" so many times that it was a relief that the bash Limbaugh segment came up in the #4 slot. Keith slowed himself to be even more classless and sleazy than we realized:
Viagra is usually dispensed in units of 30 pills...Limbaugh was found to have 29 pills on him.
Obviously Krazy is flogging this story simply for the delight of embarrassing someone who actually has people listening to him. Oh, and don't expect any concerns from KO about privacy how someone's pharmacological information "leaked" out to the public. Moret (from "Inside Edition", the show Keith has ridiculed so many times) said Limbaugh's home free if/when his doctor confirms that he gave Rush the pills. But KO kept pressing for some way the prosecutor could use this against Rush, doing his best to obscure the fact that there was no violation of Florida law.
In the "top newsmaker" segment Olby decided to lift a story from TVNewser about how Brit Hume (and, of course, Bill O'Reilly) have faced some audience declines over the past year. What happened to the famous Olbermann dismissal of ratings as irrelevant ("five billion flies can't be wrong")? Well, if KO now thinks they're important, we must do our duty here at Olbermann Watch:
O'Reilly Factor: 2,141,000 viewers
Brit Hume: 1,178,000 viewers
Countdown: 286,000 viewers
We don't think Krazy Keith is the right guy to be bringing up ratings trends.
After the half-way mark, it was global warming propaganda time, with a single guest who expressed her gw-fundamentalist viewpoint unchallenged and uncontested. How fundamentalist is she? What about the debate about whether it's man-made? "There is no debate." So much for that. Oh, there was another plug for Al Gore's movie. Talk about declining audiences!
Keith introduced the #2 story (Harry Potter, recycled video) with a vignette about the Hitchcock film "The Trouble with Harry", calling it a "bomb". (It took in three times its cost at the box office, but why ruin a good OlbyTale?) Then Star Jones, Rosie O'Donnell, Boy George, Axl Rose, and some baseball manager.
In the #1 slot, a new "feature" called "Keith's Olbermann's America", complete with supposed-to-be-funny animation of KO in a bus. But the segment was just more recycled video (this time not even from the network mothership but from a local station). You can't expect Keith to actually get on that bus and report, can you? He might bump his head.
And that's The Hour of Spin for this, the 130th day of the Keith Olbermann CoverUp. And the magic number is still three. But our mole in Seacaucus (not The Laughing Stagehand) reports that will change tomorrow.