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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
The Hour of Spin began with Krazy Keith's opening spiel, where the night's propaganda points are often distilled into nice, short soundbites
The President promises his 9/11 speech won't be political. Then the President's 9/11 speech is political. Then the President's critics attack the hypocrisy.
Now it's just sheer coincidence that deeming the speech to be "political" happened to be the chief talking point of the Dems and the blue blogs all day long. It's merely happenstance that it jump-started Herr Olbermann's patter.
KO led off bellowing about "politics of fear, politics of partisanship, politics of terror", and said Bush chose "all of the above". On what does he base that conclusion? The fact that "Democrats" reacted "angrily". Well, that must make it true, at least on OlbyPlanet.
A clip from Harry "The Body" Reid (falsely claiming the speech was "partisan") was contrasted with over-the-top comments from John Boehner and reaction from Tony Snow. The latter's position was characterized by Olby as "almost worthy of Pee-Wee Herman".
What Countdown Crony would be called to clone Keith's comments? None other than Olbermann's Brain (Craig Crawford). The sniggering solon called it "a great way to bait the opponent", and said even mentioning Iraq would have that effect. KO decided that the Democrats needed his advice, so he helpfully provided them with what he deigned to be a superior response to Bush's "political" speech
Iraq only became the central place in the war on terror because we let the terrorists into Iraq.
Krazy Keith went on to wonder when the Republicans would begin their "attack the media phase", and Brain chortled that "I'm sure we'll see plenty of it". Then Olby put on his pundit hat and declaimed that what Bush really meant is that the Iraq war is the "principal reason" we have not been attacked:
Does it not at some point sound even in the White House sound less like a President talking and more like David Koresh?
Brain snickered real good at that one. Olby dismissed Crawford with neither of them even addressing Keith's own inglorious politicization of 9/11. Then KO was off to rerun more of the "borderline rancid" Bush/Lauer interview. Keith introduced the clip with a self-quotation from one of his own "special comments" (more Olbermann onanism).
The #4 story was all about terrorism, starting with the attack in Syria. This was quickly dispensed with: KO talked over some footage. No actual report, not even of the taped and regurgitated variety. Then it was time for yesterday's news: the decline in Iraq's Anbar province. Olby noted that the Pentagon has been "unable to kill the story", and introduced Ricks (author of the Iraq war tome "Fiasco"). KO asked about the "cure for terrorism" (Democracy) that "Mister" Bush keeps advocating, and Ricks came up with the unique perspective that when you set up a democracy, elections should be "the last thing you have".
Olby offered a convoluted theory about how training Iraqis to take over security actually aids Al Qaeda, and Ricks reiterated the point, claiming that the police will actually be "death squads". KO brought up the Syrian bombing attempt, and his guest went off on a tangent about Hezbollah and "strange bedfellows".
After another fine, fine edition of the Pulitzer-worthy "oddball" (making fun of Dennis Hastert for messing up the words of the National Anthem), KO dealt with the death of Anna Nicole Smith's son (recycled from NBC). #2: Pandas (another rerun from the network mothership), Britney Spears, Keven Federline, Girls Gone Wild on Campus, Katie Couric's ratings, Meredith Viera. In the prized #1 slot: the Chicago Bears and free furniture. The "worst person" segment featured an "anti-abortion nut bag", but the real purpose was more desperate pimping of
Olbermann's book the book that bears Olbermann's name.
All things considered, after Monday's hyperbolic jeremiad, the discredited sports guy was comparitively subdued tonight. Even the MisterMeter reading was relatively calm: 2 [LOW]. Did all this, and the abundance of noxious fluff on this latest Countdown, have something to do with the returns from Monday's embarrassment? Yes, Olby was back to his usual fourth place finish, both in total viewers and in his coveted, prized, beloved "demo". All the blue bloggers and all the PR men couldn't get his ratings up again. As Olbermann loves to say: "Is this a metaphor?"