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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
The opening spiel, besides teasing another O'Reilly attack, featured the launch of another Krazy Keith Konspiracy (KKK): the whole torture debate is a trick aimed at "keeping our eyes off Iraq"! But if it is, Olby took the bait and made it his lead story. Of course he led off with the lie that torture is "of almost no use in gaining reliable information" in noting the agreement between "Mister" Bush and the Senators.
KO was puzzled how the President and the Senators could both be telling the truth. To resolve this enigmatic issue, Olby called in Craig Crawford, aka Olbermann's Brain, and immediately struck a cynical note:
Might there be less to this deal than meets the eye?
Brain giggled that it was the White House who backed down on "rewriting" (OlbySpin) the Geneva Conventions, and when it came to tonight's KKK, well, Brain swallowed. It helps the Republican Party, he chortled, and distracted from Iraq. Then, using the tried and true propaganda technique of repetition, Krazy Keith asked:
Why do you want to torture people, when torture consistently gets people to lie to you and make stuff up that they think you want them to tell you?
The answer: because you're lying, Keith. Just ask Brian Ross.
A clip from Tim Ryan (D) with him accusing the adminstration of using this to "change the subject" from Iraq. Aha! The Democrats' talking points join in perfect synergy with the KKK of the day. Mere happenstance? Like Sherlock Holmes, we do not believe in coincidences. KO was ready to urge his party leaders to kick it up a notch:
Why isn't every Democrat on Capitol Hill following Congressman Ryan's lead there?
Brain snickered that the Democrats don't have the "peasant mentality" that the younger Turks like Ryan do. Following Keith's lead, he added that they have to bring their game to the next level. After Great Thanksing Crawford, Olby went on to talk about the rise of killings and "torture" (worse than under Saddam!) in Iraq, citing a UN report. Here we go again: what is the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann not telling us this time? Manford Nowak, the Austrian law professor who came to these conclusions, got his information from people in various Middle Eastern cities, and, for his part, has never even been to Iraq. Um, OK.
Some talk about troop levels led into a return appearance from Thomas Ricks. The military has problems "recognizing reality". A clip from a Bush presser led KO to suggest the President was contradicting himself, and Ricks blamed it all on "redefining" what it means for the Iraqis to "stand up". He proclaimed the US effort to be "dysfunctional" and sidestepped Olby's suggestion that "we're making it worse".
The #4 story was about corrupt politicians. All of a sudden poll numbers were news on Countdown, because they showed the Congressional approval rating was down to 25%. Then came a list of "tainted" lawmakers: three Democrats, three Republican Senators, with Olby taking special note of "Rick 'Man on Dog' Santorum", and two GOP House members. Also mentioned were several politicos on a sidebar list of people to watch, including
Bill Frist Dennis Hastert (R) and John Murtha (D).
All of this led Keith "Man on Fan" Olbermann to introduce Melanie Sloan, from C.R.E.W. (a "nonpartisan" organization whose honchos are drawn from the ranks of outfits like Olby's favorite Soros site, Media Matters). Sloan named William Jefferson (D) the most ethically dubious member of Congress. Countdown viewers must have been thinking: who he? For all his legal troubles, Jefferson has gotten barely a notice from KO. Olbermann Watch had to hector Keith for months just to get him to mention the guy!
Sloan may be a Democrat (a protoge of Joe Biden) but she was mostly even-handed, despite KO's best efforts. Still, she did get in a dig at Tom Delay (R), who isn't even in Congress any more.
After another award-winning chapter of "oddball" and a tease for Herr Olbermann's latest indulging of his chief Olbsession, we got a puff piece on Clinton's Global Initiative. Richard Branson's three-billion dollar pledge to fight global warming was handled with a taped rerun from NBC. (Branson himself was too busy talking about it over on Fox to bother with visiting Keith.) Though Olby said not one word about it, the report did include a five-second clip of the goings on at the UN. Not surprisingly, that was the only mention of Hugo Chavez on the entire Hour of Spin.
There was a tease for another Big Olbermann Interview: B.J. Clinton, tomorrow on Countdown. Watch the tough questions fly! See Olby hone in with searing follow-ups! And also a tease for the latest on Mr Bill. Followed by a tease for the latest on Mr Bill. Followed by surveillance cameras in England (more recycled video from the network mothership). Then Michael Jackson, Barry Bonds, Cameron Diaz, and Justin Timberlake. Oh, and Breaking News: KO pimped his book (while naming Enron's Jeff Skilling "worst").
Finally, the Big Moment: the latest installment of the discredited sports guy and his incurable infatuation with Mr Bill O'Reilly. Still flogging his flippant dismissal of threats to O'Reilly's life from yesterday, KO launched into another thrilling edition of "Factor Fiction". Because Keith knows it's fiction, and cited an online magazine (Radar) as his "proof" that O'Reilly is "lying again". All this based on an "unnamed Fox News correspondent", an unnamed Fox spokesman, unnamed somebodies from unnamed other news organizations, and an unnamed "law enforcement official" who was "not aware" of any of this.
Marcus Baram, of Radar, at first refused to take Keith's bait ("he's not telling the truth") and would only say that O'Reilly might be exagerrating. Then Baram warmed up and said "it feeds into his own fantasy", though Fox was visited by FBI agents regarding the kidnapping of their reporters in Gaza. Keith "Man on Fan" Olbermann grunted an mm-hm to that, another puzzling reference to Countdown viewers who never heard a word about it from old infamous and deplorable. The interview creaked on, devoid of news value, reaching its peak of ludicrous pseudo-journalism when Baram quoted a competitor of O'Reilly saying it was "all B.S." Like, how would a competitor know? Like, which competitor was it? Hell, it could have been Olbermann himself who gave that quote. We wouldn't put it past him.
While Olby regularly spikes genuine news because it doesn't fit his propaganda goals, he eagerly lapped up every unsubstantiated word from the Radar scribbler. (It's the topic du jour on A-Mess-NBC, given the coverage from Tucker Carlson and Joe Scarborough.) But is the left-leaning Radar a reliable source? Do they have an agenda? Keith won't tell you. We will.
It wasn't that long ago that Radar "outed" the CIA background of Anderson Cooper; it took a while, but eventually observers realized that exposing CIA ties, however tenuous, of a reporter could make him more of a target to terrorists. Dare we say, it might even put Cooper on an Al Qaeda "death list". Clearly, Radar has a vested interest in pooh-poohing terrorist threats made to reporters, if only to cover their own backsides.
But why should anyone believe Radar anyhow? They had a huge exclusive--Mary Mapes (whose critics were "wingnuts", according to Radar) was rejoining Dan Rather at HDNet. Only one problem: it wasn't true. Said Mapes: "They totally made it up. It's hilarious." Oops. This, ladies and gentlemen, was Olbermann's Great Source for O'Reilly attack #113.
In addition to spiking news about Hugo Chavez and the other visiting "dignitaries", Keith was careful not to bring up another inconvenient truth. The Army just had its best recruiting year since 1997. Just like falling gas prices, that isn't consistent with OlbySpin, so you won't hear it on Countdown. In the ratings game, where Krazy Keith insists he is surging, he once again finished in a humilitating fourth place. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]