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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
Welcome to Hyperbole City, as the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann kicked off his opening spiel by bellowing that the newly-signed Military Commissions law was comparable to the old Alien and Sedition Act, and the internment of Japanese Americans. Then another big, breaking story: the President met with six talk show hosts, along with a sex scandal update. In what might be a new record, Countdown managed to lie six times in about eight minutes.
In the pointless reference department, Olby noted that 135 years ago today, President Grant suspended habeas corpus in South Carolina. Then it was on to KO's first fabrication:
Your principal defense against imprisonment without charge and trial without defense thrown away without good reason. 
Then he compounded the felony, saying that the new law:
...does away with habeas corpus, the right of suspected terrorists, or anybody else, to know why they have been imprisoned, provided the President does not think it should apply to you and declares you an enemy combatant. 
This is a flat-out falsehood concocted for the gullible cretins who labor under the mistaken notion that Monkeymann tells the truth. The law does not do away with habeas corpus for "terrorists or anybody else". We've gone through this before, but it's always worthwhile pointing out another Olbermann lie.
Herr Olbermann went on to quote from Senators Kennedy (D), Leahy (D), and Feingold (D). He didn't note that the law passed with 65 votes in the Senate, meaning that a fair number of Dems backed it. And of course, there were no quotes from any of those who supported the measure, regardless of which side of the aisle they were on.
At this point it was time for another episode of everyone's favorite sitcom, Olby and the Perfessor. Jonathan Turley's opinion is well-known to Herr Olbermann, and the Perfessor certainly did not disappoint. KO asked about the definition of an unlawful enemy combatant, and asked if that means "Mister" Bush could declare anyone as such. "It certainly does." Surprise. Then:
...under this law, ultimately the only thing keeping you, I [sic], or the viewer out of Gitmo is the sanity and honesty of the President of the United States? 
"It does."  Surprise again. How odd that neither Olby nor the Perfessor mentioned 1005(e)(2), that gives federal courts power to review detention of enemy combatants. And of course the law clearly states that restrictions of habeas corpus only apply to aliens--not U.S. citizens. Once again, Olbermann and his enabler lie to their viewers by not giving all the facts. Instead, the Perfessor whimpered about "200 years of American principles and values"--without ever stating when in those 200 years this country ever fought a war that granted habeas corpus rights to enemy combatants. But "Fat Ass" Olbermann wasn't done, referencing again the "elimination of habeas corpus"  (does he think a lie becomes true if he just repeats it enough?), and the Perfessor squealed about how we have an "uber-President" who can hold anyone he wants without trial . Fric and Frac reprised their golden oldie about "torture", Monkeymann suggested the threat we are really facing is "the threat of, uh, President George W Bush", and a good time was had by all. Except for the credulous OlbyLoons who think A-Mess-NBC is a reputable news organization.
Then Krazy Keith was out to complain that the President met with five conservative radio talk show hosts. As if this were breaking news--it happened a month ago! And it was hardly a secret, since the people involved spoke of it at length on the air and on the web. But maybe KO only listens to Err America, and they didn't get invited. Nonetheless, this
old ancient news was deemed vital enough to bring in Howard Fineman, Pundit for All Occasions. Olby whined that the President was using the White House for "political purposes". What? There's politics going on in the White House? Herr Olbermann was shocked! Shocked! Howie opined that the President was "speaking to the choir", but neither he nor Olbermann explained what is so sinister about Bush talking to people in the media.
Always looking to cast every Bush move as politically stupid, KO wondered if signing the tribunals act would actually "energize the Democrats or other critics"? Fineman obediently replied, "I think it may." He then went on to add that "it" applies to American citizens, again not telling that denial of habeas corpus is not part of that "it". Yes, it was another "culture of corruption" (Dem talking point and therefore OlbySpin phrase) report from the nonpartisan Olbermann.
For this, we got another visit from Dana Milbank, sans splashy smock, who delivered "rumors" about a "16-year-old girl". He spoke of guilty pleas in the Abramoff matter (R), as well as the matters of DeLay (R), Libby (R), Foley (R), Weldon (R), and Hastert (R). Hmm, were there some corruption allegations that he neglected to mention? Maybe people with a (D) after their names? Nah, can't be. You would never get one-sided reporting on The Hour of Spin.
After great thanksing Milbank and another brilliantly conceived chapter of the oddball saga, KO brought us tonight's installment of the Olbermann Vote Suppression Project. Evangelicals will stay home. And Olby had a little barb for Mr Kuo himself, who didn't like the way Countdown characterized his book:
This is a newscast, and not Reader's Digest.
A newscast? That's Olbermann lie #7. Then back to suppressing the evangelical vote. The Global Aids coordinator is gay. Condi Rice referred to his partner's mom as a "mother-in-law". The Family Research Council didn't like it. The Wolffe Man tittered about promises not delivered, Olby talked about worshipping two masters, and KO came up with another brilliant prediction of doom. After pounding home all the ways the evangelical vote was going to be suppressed, Krazy Keith decided he could eat his cake and have it too by adding that moderate Republicans might also "sit this one out". Even Wolffie didn't bite on this stale babka.
#2: The resume that ended up on YouTube--how many weeks has this story been making the rounds? No matter, recycled NBC reportage did manage to fill some time until Wesley Snipes and the Crocodile Hunter. #1: Madonna and other big news with the creepy Michael Musto. The Media Matters Minute slammed Michael Savage: he's "just a moron". Wait, I thought O'Reilly was the moron. No, that was yesterday. And Rev Olbermann took pains to tell us that another of his infrequent, rarely seen, only occasional "special comments" is coming on Wednesday: the end of habeas corpus. Man, if he could lie about it six times tonight, imagine the fabrications he can spew by yammering for an entire segment. Clear-headed readers will want to bone up on the subject so they can anticipate Olbermann's lies before he disgorges them.
Dogs that did not bark: North Korea may be preparing another nuke test, but Edward R Olbermann could care less. The KO "scandal watch" continues to ignore the ethical difficulties of Harry Reid (D) and the Governor of Illinois. And no outrage (phony or otherwise) at the New York Post; some things just hit too close to home. Disgracefully, Krazy Keith has allowed to stand his baseless smear of Chris Mihlfield and Albert Pujols, lifted from a discredited and retracted blog entry.
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #99 at amazon, while Mr Bill's "Culture Warrior" is #17. And O'Reilly's book stands at #2 on a list the OlbyTome never could crack: New York Times Best Sellers. Monday's Neilsens gave the No-Spin Zone nearly 2.5 million viewers; Krazy Keith did better than usual (648k), but still finished third, both in total viewers and in Keith's coveted, all-important, critical, key "demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW].