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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
The opening spiel: Keith bellowed about secret Iraq negotiations by "Mister" Bush, Rangel and the draft, OJ, Kramer, and bonus oddball. Bad news from Iraq was the lead, with Olby getting his item about "secret" negotiations from an unconfirmed story on a blue blog. This is the state of journalism at NBC News.
The Wolffe Man said the President wants to show independence, but Olby wanted to know about the "secret" negotiations "reported" by a blogger. Will they pass muster with the "neocons"? Wolffie said they've been going on for some time, and Iraq will always be "President Bush's war". At least he didn't say "Mister" Bush's war. Dopeymann tried to paint Bush's overseas trips as some sort of strategy to keep his domestic profile low, but the Wolffe Man told him, don't be stoopid, these trips are planned months if not years in advance. Well, maybe not in those exact words.
Then it was time for Lawrence ("Liar! Creepy Liar!") O'Donnell, misleadingly introduced as a "political analyst", when he is actually a Democrat political strategist (and The List has been updated accordingly). Crazy Larry said Rangel's draft proposal should be "taken seriously", easy to claim when you don't bother telling people how virutally no one (including the new Speaker) supports it. The deranged one spewed blue blog talking points about "combat cowards", which is the newly-minted version of the old "chickenhawk" argument--a finer piece of demented demagoguery you will never find. And if something is demagogic, you know it will appeal to Monkeymann. He gushed that there were many questions to be asked, but he wouldn't, because:
...I think it would be impolite and disrespectful to the great point that you just made to ask them here.
Ewwwwww. KO's tongue bath of Crazy Larry surely had Dana Milbank seething with jealousy. It was that repellent. (We won't even contemplate what Musto was thinking.)
#4: the US government "spying" on peaceful citizens. It was a recycled story from the network mothership, predicated on the shocking news that the government has a database, and it puts names in them. No! And what's more, they put things in this database like public information about public events. Horrors! This of course isn't "spying" at all. Anyone has the right to keep a record of public information. And, Herr Olbermann notwithstanding, that includes people who work for the government.
Then we got oddball, plus an entire segment on OJ Simpson (with Harvey Levin). Then an entire segment on Michael Richards, where "Fat Ass" Olbermann could be seen backpedaling from his Tuesday night rehab attempts. Yesterday, Olby praised Richards for making an apology so "quickly"; but tonight, KO pointedly said the apology only came after the video was made public. Uh oh, Michael is obviously not going to be on Olby's Festivus Card list.
Then Britney Spears, a repeatedly-bobbled bit on David Blaine, and a fistful of oddball. In the Media Matters Minute, even Keith "Man on Fan" Olbermann couldn't find a way to pin something on O'Reilly--he's out of the country! So he settled for the next best thing, "ridiculous radio yakker Melanie Morgan". Her crime was saying that there is a "bulls-eye" on Nancy Pelosi, which Rev Olbermann took as an opportunity to sermonize about how the eeevil right-wingers will interpret that as open season to actually shoot her. Oh, wait. We know your question before you ask it. You wonder how the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann can say all this with a straight face, when on Countdown he himself presented a visual "joke" that made Rush Limbaugh the target of gunfire. There is no answer other than: it's hypocrisy; it's puerile; it's OlbyLogic.
Muted mongrels: Nothing from Krazy Keith about the assassination in Lebanon. Another thing you won't hear from KO: oil now under $60 a barrel. Herr Olbermann has yet to report that his much-hyped "war crimes" charges against Rummy are "unlikely to proceed". The arrest of 39 Talibans was dutifully ignored. And still KO refuses to tell his viewers how Jack Abramoff has pointed the finger of corruption at none other than Harry "The Body" Reid.
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sits at #360 at amazon, while Mr Bill's "Culture Warrior" stands #12. At Barnes & Noble the OlbyTome circles the drain at #2,061, while O'Reilly's book is #34. And Mr Bill's literary triumph sits in the #3 slot on the New York Times Best Sellers list. The Tuesday night ratings are not available, so we'll make them up. Our best scientific estimate is that Olby came in third place, both in total viewers and in the critical, beloved, all-important, coveted "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]