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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
Considering this was Plame Day, the opening spiel sounded curiously subdued. Jabber about Plame, how she didn't recommend her husband, clip of Waxman (D), GonzalesGate, Dems advised to boycott The Colbert Report, and a woman who threw boric acid at someone. Clear the lines, because Olby is phoning it in tonight. But watch for the infamous, deplorable one to serve up another whopper of a lie. It may be Friday, but dishonesty never rests on The Hour of Spin.
#5: After mentioning the Gonzales "scandal" [Ding!], it was straight to Good Old Mrs Wilson and that "scandal" [Ding!]. Lengthy clips of the blonde bombshell denying that she even suggested her husband. (We'll see if Oralmann mentions that this claim is contrary to the sworn testimony in the Libby trial of Robert Grenier of the CIA. Update: What a shock. He didn't.) Not one challenging question was shown, nor any of the other testimony of the day. The spin starts here.
Then it was time for Lefty Olby Crazy Larry. Johnson, the Nostradamus who ridiculed the notion that we had anything to fear from terrorism or Bin Laden just two months before 9/11, was the impartial expert. (He of course is a partisan Democrat, but somehow Olby didn't mention that either.) Valerie was "relaxed", "terrific", "poised", "elegant", "serious", "patriotic"...need we go on? KO talked about "outrageous", "damage", and attacked Victoria Toensing's testimony without even showing it, a classic propaganda technique. Crazy joined in by saying Ms Toensing was a "twit" and should be drug-tested. Then Keith, like Old Faithful, delivered again:
Mr Fitzgerald made a statement on the courthouse steps saying there's no question she was covert.
From the Fitzgerald transcript:
FITZGERALD: Let me say two things. Number one, I am not speaking to whether or not Valerie Wilson was covert. And anything I say is not intended to say anything beyond this: that she was a CIA officer from January 1st, 2002, forward. I will confirm that her association with the CIA was classified at that time through July 2003. And all I'll say is that, look, we have not made any allegation that Mr. Libby knowingly, intentionally outed a covert agent. We have not charged that. And so I'm not making that assertion.
OK, gang, you make the call. Do we, or do we not, have Yet Another Olbermann Lie? Show of hands please? Thank You! Add this one to the list when we do the Top Ten Oralmann Lies of 2007.
After Great Thanksing Crazy Larry, it was on to "GonzalesGate" and "another emerging scandal" [Ding!]. Olby quoted three Repubs against the AG, and zero in favor. Then the "new scandal" [Ding!], a "new scandal" [Ding!] about surveillance of terrorists. Something about the OPR, Gonzales, "Mister" Bush, and an ethics investigation. Who should show up (again) but The Wolffe Man! Another "top newsmaker". Wolffie simpered about "circling the wagons", while Herr Olbermann dragged in Karl Rove, complaining that they can't get anything to stick on him. Great thanks.
#3: Politics, with a regurgitated report from NBC. Dana Milbank, lacking loud livery, showed up yet again. The only significant note was that "Man on Fan" Olbermann slobbered over Al Gore, hoping that the primary schedule might work in his favor. How ironic. Not that long ago, Rev Olbermoronn was ridiculing James Imhofe for referencing Gore as a potential candidate, stating:
Mr. Gore's not running. Where do we get these guys? Are we paying our senators enough?
Yes, Mr Imhofe was made WPitW for that. But when Krazy Keith does the same himself, that's perfectly acceptable. On OlbyPlanet, the rules that go for everyone else never apply to Mr Humility himself. (Dana got Great Thanks. Natch.)
#2 was another episode of "Keith Olbermann's America". The last episode was, what, sometime last year? Despite the funny animation that shows Fat Ass in a bus, Monkeymann of course never leaves the safety of his desk, or his bathtub. It's just a piece of recycled tape from a local tv news department. Like we said, phoning it in. Plus Michael Jackson and Elton John. #1: Dems advised to boycott Colbert (which Olby ignored until we pointed it out), complete with a slam at "right-wing bloggers".
In the Media Matters Minute, Fat Ass managed to fill two slots (conservative + Fox) with one attack: Sean Hannity (Blue Blog Source: Media Matters). And after a sideways swipe at Bill "Orally" (this makes attack #165, if you're counting), he tossed in a stinkbomb at Glenn Beck for saying Hillary sounded like a "bitch" (Blue Blog Source: Media Matters). Really, Beck. Don't you know if you want to demean a woman, you have to use one of the Olbermahn-approved smears? You know, like "airhead", "old bag", "c-nt", "horse", or "slut". From now on, stick to the words authorized for use on OlbyPlanet.
Mute mongrels: Nothing about the Dem Iraq plan going down to defeat in the Senate. For the second day in a row. Krazy Keith is such a koward. Also spiked: Are school busses in danger from extremists or terrorists? Two Senators, including Carl Levin (D), witnessed the confession of KSM that Olby has so studiously avoided. Iran remains intransigent. And our weekly assessment of Olbermahn's masculinity. Over the past week Olbermann has attacked Fox, CNN, and Limbaugh/right-wing pundits nine times; Olby criticisms of MSNBC: zero. Meanwhile, his primary source (Media Matters) criticized MSNBC seven times. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -20 [limp].
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #8,585 at amazon.com, while "Culture Warrior" is #384. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome is #2,710 at Barnes & Noble; O'Reilly's book is #1,006 there. Thursday night's Nielsen's are not available, but take our word for it: "Man on Fan" Olbermann lost overwhelmingly, both in total viewers and in the critical, beloved, all-important, coveted "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 5 [ELEVATED]