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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
A typical opening spiel from the infamous, deplorable one: Bush is trying to "sneak" a nominee through, and it "may be illegal". Why is the GOP behind the Dems in money? Gonzales "praciticing" tesimony; Pelosi is doing what Hastert did; Sanjaya and American Idol; and even more about Keith Richards. Pretty blah lineup, nothing that will compare with our special Olbermann's Masculinity edition of Dogs That Did Not Bark.
UPDATE (RCox): Video & Transcript
#5: Because Bush made a recess appointment of an ambassador, that means he is not "sincere" in dealing with Congress over Iraq funding. And he's a "swift-boat fundraiser", no less. He is? He raised money for the swift boat campaign? Edward R Olbermann did not source this claim, but we're sure there's a blue blog somewhere, out where the busses don't run, that says it. What's more, Kerry (D) claims the appointment is illegal, Dodd (D) is against it and... Well, there is no "and". If you expected any quotes from people on the other side of the issue, then you are new to OlbyPlanet.
Lefty Alter was asked if "Mister" Bush never cared about Congress in the first place, and he shot back that a recess appointment is "the ultimate thumb in the eye of the opposition" and asserted that it isn't done very often. Olby's sock-puppet did note that such appointments are not illegal, but then claimed Bill Clinton made recess appointments "on a very rare occasion". There were 140 rare occasions. Lefty gushed over the "oversight" by Congress, and of course Olby Great Thanksed him.
Plus: the Pentagon is tapping into the National Guard again. And Gonzales is cramming for his Senate testimony. That brings us to tonight's episode of Olby and the Perfessor. Edward R Olbermann said Gonzo is either "rewriting the truth" or has to study up on what he should already know, so it can't bode well for him (Rule #1). The Perfessor said "everything" Gonzo said is contradicted by his own aids, and he may have lied under oath. Unless he didn't. Monica Goodling taking the fifth before Congress is "incompatible" with her status. We should count ourselves lucky. At least tonight Krazy Keith didn't suggest asserting a constitutional right is not legal. Oh, and he didn't call Gonzales a houseboy. Good Olby. The Perfessor was Great Thanksed.
#4: Dems have more money than Republicans. Nyah, Nyah, Nyah! Besides, Romney got his money from those Mormon people. Oooooh, that's scaaaaaary! Maddow was there to send OlbySpin into hyperdrive: it's all Bush's fault. Oh, and Cheney too. The two of them got almost orgasmic over Dems and libs raising money. The decibel level kept rising; they spoke faster and faster. Finally the discussion climaxed with a Great thanks (for this relief).
#3: It's GOP hypocrisy! The "right wing" criticizes Pelosi for going to Syria, but didn't criticize Repubs who did the same. Um, might that be because the Repubs didn't nearly cause an international incident due to incompetent bungling? Ya think? Doesn't that matter to the story? Hard to say, since Olby never mentioned that part of it. Wendy Sherman, a crony of Madeline Albright, was the "expert" who talked a lot but said only what Olbermann wanted to hear. His patented leading questions (Didn't Denny Hastert do it too?) helped steer the conversation away from the central fact that under the law, the executive branch is the sole organ of foreign policy. Sherman gloated how Blair's "quiet diplomacy" freed the hostages. Say what? According to Fat Ass, they were freed because the U.S. "blinked"! Oh, and Wendy never mentioned Pelosi's embararssing blunder either. The echo chamber on OlbyPlanet stays pure. Great thanks.
After a commercial break, which bizarrely included an ad for Countdown itself, we got #2: a hoax advertisement (regurgitated video), Keith Richards, Billy Packer. #1: Another segment trading on the success of American Idol.
The Media Matters Minute showed again how fleeting acceptance is on OlbyPlanet. Take the case of Mike Allen, honored Countdown guest on more than one occasion:
But Allen left Time and now works for Politico, and Politico is being linked to by the eeevil Matt Drudge (Blue Blog Source: Media Matters). And as if that weren't enough, Allen has committed the unpardonable sin: he's criticized Democrats (Blue Blog Source: Media Matters). Result: Mike Allen, you're a "worst person"! (Along with the more traditional choices of Glenn Beck and Cheney.)
Dogs That Did Not Bark: Special Olbermann Masculinity Edition
For those who may have tuned in late, we will explain the premise. Back in November of last year Olbermahn blasted Bill O'Reilly for not speaking out against the OJ Simpson book and the proposed Fox tv show. An Olbermann Lie to be sure (O'Reilly was leading the charge against it) but no matter. Olby declaimed that even if something were on NBC, he would be "just as vociferous" in speaking out as he is regarding people on other channels. He pontificated that if you cannot be critical of "your own network", then you have no "manhood". Oddly, since making that statement, we don't recall one single example of Edward R Olbermann speaking out, vociferously or otherwise, about any of the commentators or reporters on NBC.
So, flashback to March 31, 2006, when Oralmann took aim at Neil Boortz, whose crime was making fun of Cynthia McKinney's appearance, specifically her "Brillo pad" hairdo. Based on that, Monkeymann declared Boortz to be a racist. Fine. Now give a listen to what one of A-Mess-NBC's top-rated program hosts said yesterday. Have we heard one word from Olbermoronn? How's your masculinity now, Keith? What, you want more? Just yesterday Herr Olbermann attacked John Derbyshire of National Review; he criticized the the British sailors/hostages for being spineless. What do you suppose happened this morning? Listen to A-Mess-NBC's own military expert, Col Jack Jacobs, on Peacock air [mp3]:
Not one peep out of "Man on Fan" Olbermann, vociferous or otherwise. Silence. By Keith's own standards, the Olbermann Manhood Quotient remains: [limp].
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name has soared to a stunning #23,136 at amazon.com, while "Culture Warrior" is #220. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome is #3,753 at Barnes & Noble; O'Reilly's book is #214 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. The Wednesday ratings have not been published, but take it from us: "Man on Fan" Olbermann lost overwhelmingly, both in total viewers and in the critical, beloved, all-important, coveted "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 4 [ELEVATED]
UPDATE (RCox): Video & Transcript
Keith Olbermann interviews Jonathon Alter