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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
Monday is on us and the opening spiel is as lively as ever. Tenet "racket", the President had already made up his mind on Iraq, taking Rice's word seems ridiculous to Olby. What else is new. Chaos is everywhere! Of course, the 4th anniversary of the "declaration of 'Mission Accomplished'." Hm, don't ever recall that being declared.
UPDATE: Video & Transcript
#5: George Tenet predicted everything! The prophet is here! Keith attempts to bolster his credibility by reminding his audience by saying, "As any sportscaster could tell you, the best way to enhance your reputation for predictions is to not reveal any of them until after the season is over." Ah, such humor. Is it ever not about baseball? Tenet, apparently, let "falsehoods" stand even though Olby has a hard time stating exactly what those lies are. "Man On Fan" implies that Tenet has no credibility as he gets a date wrong, but Olbersturmfuhrer seems incredibly excited to point to all the "lies" that Tenet is exposing. Cherry picking as usual. Enter Philip Giraldi, a counter terrorism "specialist" and a contributor to "American Conservative" magazine. Now, dear readers, as you probably know, Olby loves conservatives who criticize other conservatives. One thing Monkey Man leaves out is that "American Conservative" is a magazine for paleoconservatives, those that are generally antiwar and isolationist. But "conservative" in Countdown means all of those who are part of the vast right wing conspiracy. Fat Ass muses that Tenet could have perhaps stood on a street corner and barked "the truth." His esteemed guest naturally agrees and suggests he should have resigned and was either incompetent or a liar. Naturally this is all speculation with nothing to back it up. Why bother? Olby gets upset at having to root for "either side" but seems to be more happy with anyone who will discredit the President. Giraldi suggests there was little truth behind Tenet's testimony before congress. As in: HE LIED! Jabba the Hut moves on to "enhanced interrogation" which to Olby means "torture" and immediately moves from there to begin a debate on torture. Yet, they can't produce a SINGLE PERSON who has EVER BEEN TORTURED. More hypotheticals posited as truth. Typical. Giraldi says no one would support the assertion that "enhanced" interrogation (Read: water boarding, not torture) doesn't work. Hm. No attacks on the USA in six years. Guess it doesn't work. It's all about Tenet making money. By the way, he's a war criminal, Iraq didn't threaten us. "Well stated," states KO. Great thanks.
#4: Right off the bat, the infamous, deplorable KO declares Iraq a "war predicated on lies" and that Bush is going to veto a bill to fund the war on the "fourth anniversary of the declaration of Mission Accomplished." Olby clearly knows this is a lie, as he later states that the President declared the end of "major combat operations" with the words "mission accomplished hovering over him." Interesting how he manages to lie, tell the truth, then lie again. Enter the Wolffe Man. More Tenet talk. "Truth squading" by the government of the government which is highly suspect to Olby. I doubt he minds the so-called "oversight" of the Congress controlled by the Democrats. Wolffie argues that Tenet played both sides, makes some reference to Tora Bora and more assertions that seemingly come out of the blue. Olbersturmfuhrer makes a comparison of Bush to Gonzales (read: clueless). Much to Olby's excitement, he references Murtha and his "stature" when he suggested that impeachment can "influence the President." Olbermann wonders if someone like Murtha and his stature and position would now use it as a "last resort." Definitely has not been a last resort for John Conyers and the like. Deeply upsetting to Keithy, Wolffeman does not agree with the idea of impeaching the President solely to influence his position and use it as "leverage." Wolffie almost became a necon by suggesting that just "talking about impeachment" doesn't convince anyone. Either be serious or not. It's strange to Wolffe. Olbermann, ever depressed, replied by stating that we "lowered the bar ten years ago." Of course we did Keith. Of course we did. And I am sure that you are ashamed of every day you spent covering that impeachment and the money MSNBC gave you for it. Wolffe agrees but replies that throwing it into a war spending debate is "superfluous."
Oddball, typically lame jokes. Some Volcano. Shot lava 600 feet in the air! Wow! Snooze.
#3: Sex scandal![Ding!] Story from the mothership. Dana Milbank, a professional, apparently, comes in. Olby declares he "bears the scars of Monica Lewinsky." Un huh. At least Milbank says the list of clients of the D.C. Madam is "bipartisan." He jokes that "Man on Fan" could be on the list. Would anyone be surprised? Insults thrown around at the D.C. Madam that fall into the typical misogyny of OlbyPlanet. Double entendres abound! Does it embarrass the administration? Of course it does! Why bother reporting on it on Countdown? Milbank, again to this viewers shock, states this is near nothing to worry about. Just a "thanks" tonight.
#2: Tony Snow's return after treatment for his cancer. More regurgitated video from HQ. Tony's interview with David Gregory. I guess Olby couldn't swing one with his "friend" Mr. Snow.
#1: Interview with Jason Bateman. Filler. Out of stories to report tonight.
Giuliani kicked off the Media Matters minute, followed by Fox News and a producer of a liberal radio show implied as a right wing zealot for appearing on said network culminating in a thinly veiled attack on the Bush administration. The bronze went to Giuliani campaign for apparently releasing a list of campaign backers who don't back him (Blue Blog source: HuffPo). Second: Bernard McGuirk, former producer of Imus in the Morning, for making an analogy that didn't suit the Fuhrer (Blue Blog source: Media Matters). The gold went to the implied Bush administration because Bin Laden still has not been caught. (Blue Blog source: HuffPo).
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name soared to #3,714 at amazon.com, but "Culture Warrior" is #600. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome struggled to rank at #4,965 at Barnes & Noble; O'Reilly's book is #1,007 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. He had good ratings for a Friday. The Hour of Spin managed second, both in total viewers and in the critical, beloved, all-important, coveted "key demo". The MisterMeter was off again.
UPDATE: Video & Transcript
Keith Olbermann on the DC Madam (more KO misogyny)