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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
The Hour of Spin kicked into high gear tonight. Keith somehow managed to swing not only Mo Rocca but Dana Milbank, fresh off his fancy pants dinner. Oralmann bellowed about it "snowing" (Sen. Olympia Snowe) on Capitol Hill - ha! - now in favor of timetables, "Mr. Snow" saying the President will veto another bill "limiting his divine right of war." Perverted caption saying "See Dick Spin" under the Vice President's image, who says members of the military and Iraqi government agree with him and the President. "Thanks Dick" (pervert comment #whatever) from Olby - ha! Clips of a General against the war (funny how these showed up on DailyKos and other blue blogs). American "I-dull." Keith even brought out his cool, sparingly used glasses!
UPDATE: video & transcript below
#5: "It's game time," from the Vice President to the Iraqi government. What were the last four years, Dick, batting practice?" asks Keith. What's with the penis fascination? Regurgitated video from Tim Russert and Brian Williams already. Russert asserts Americans are ready for "defeat" according to Republican congressmen. Petreaus is now the front man on Iraq. Dana Milbank appears without his white suit for deep insight. Another "turning point" vis a vis Republicans breaking ranks. The President lacks credibility on the war according to Republicans as well. Keith wonders if anyone can convince the President he has no credibility at all!
John Boehner is implied as agreeing with notion of the timetable. If one examines his website and actual quotes, this is not what he said. "I used to run a small business. I owned a small business. I had benchmarks every month, but if I didn't meet the benchmarks, if I missed the profit margin, I didn't shut down the business. I didn't yank the funds and close up the door. I tried to figure out what do I need to do in order to meet those benchmarks. That's the whole point. I'm for benchmarks that are for success. I'm not for benchmarks with artificial timelines, yanking funds, trying to ensure that there's failure in Iraq." Rep. Boehner's website. This does not comply with OlbySpin. All Republicans must look like they are abandoning ship and in agreement that a timetable (read: Iraq is a failure) is necessary.
Did the President get the message? "That will be difficult to see," says Milbank. Milbank says these are "mainstream" Republicans but does add the caveat they are "vulnerable." Olbermahn uses the analogy of Goldwater going to the White House to tell Nixon [Ding!] that the Watergate [Ding!] gig is up with the Republican congressmen meeting with the President. Clip of "Dick" stating that sectarian violence down. Keith blathers. Another clip of "Dick" saying Iraqi officials should know it's important to work together. The Vice President is playing a video of "Wizard of Oz" says Keith. What?
Votevets.org (antiwar group) video clip of Gen. Batiste saying he left the army in protest. Why did he leave? Primarily because of a perceived lack of funding and insufficient troops. Doing rather pedestrian google-search, I came across an article about Gen. Batiste's claims per lack of funding. "The Wall Street Journal writes that when Paul Wolfowitz visited Iraq in June 2004, "Gen. Batiste said that his division had spent $41 million in three months on rebuilding. It had $23 million left for the remaining six months of the year. That wasn't enough, he says." Fast forward only two months later, to August 27, 2004. General Batiste held a press conference in Tikrit, Iraq to announce that $2 Billion had been earmarked for the Salah ad Din Province. "This is a huge amount of money and a gift from the U.S. taxpayers," Batiste said. Clearly that problem was solved. General Batiste presented a problem to his superiors and he got what he asked for. It is tough to see what General Batiste's beef is in regard to funding." Source. According to these sourced quotes from the Wall Street Journal and an official DOD website, Batiste claimed that $2 Billion was a massive gift from the taxpayers and had no problem with that. Gen. Batiste's criticisms, while probably genuine albeit misguided, are being hijacked by the far left as they are falling in line with Democratic talking points. Though his relevance has declined rapidly since the departure of Fmr. Sec. of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. He was frequently used by Democrats to force the Secretary out (which they eventually got). Why is he still appearing in video clips on OlbyPlanet? Because any officer, even though there were only three of them during the Democratic "oversight" panel in 2006, are welcome any time to bash the administration and its policies. Source. The fact that there are many other officers out there who are either do not disagree or respect the fact they serve the will of the United States government is irrelevant.
Bring in Jon Soltz, Army Captain. Jabba rattles off various names of Generals. Soltz says Wesley Clarke should be included. Wasn't Clarke running for President rather than being in Iraq? Surprisingly, this ad is aimed at Republicans. What about those Democrats who are against timetables too? Since they vote for Speaker Pelosi, might as well leave them alone. They'll probably fall in line as long as they get subsidies for their peanut farmers: Washington Post Editorial. Just demonstrate a collapsing Republican consensus (11 members of the House, known as the "Gang of Eleven" by Keith). Again, running out of questions, MonkeyMann asks if this is a "turning point." Soltz surprisingly doesn't think so. Musings on so-called "redeployment." Thanks for your time.
#4: All new developments, all new scandals! [Ding!] "Gonzo-gate!" [Ding!] Adam's Apple Olbermann's "research" has revealed that Gonzales testimony tomorrow is merely a repeat of his testimony earlier. Great work, Olby. Holy smokes, Slippery Shuster is back! He must have been pouring through those documents as usual, doing "research." Laughs shared about how the "testimony" is the same. Suspicians that eeeeevil Karl Rove was involved in the firing of US Attorneys. Does any of this matter? Not really. They serve at the pleasure of the President. But there must be a scandal somewhere. This is a "sensitive and fast changing scandal" [Ding!] opines Olbersturmfuhrer. Yet Shuster says that Gonzales delegated the job of firing the attorneys to subordinates. Isn't this "Gonzo-gate"? So who really is behind the firings? Wait, it doesn't matter! Because they can be fired at any time for any reason! Great thanks.
Newsmakers: Baseball dude: Vernon Wells. Some Aussies not paying their wedding tab. Michael Schreiber hanging out in a graveyard drunk. Serious news from a serious reporter.
#3: Reminder of Tornados. This is fourth story says Keith, whoops, third actually! Of course, this is not about protecting people from natural disasters. It's about insulting "Mister" Bush who is the "Cheerlearder in Chief." Only the Governor Sebelius (D) is interested in delivering substantive help. The President just wants to "touch people's souls." Naturally, it has some sexual innuendo in Keith's voice. Regurgitated video from the Mothership. Why hasn't Fat Ass gotten out from behind his desk and go to Kansas? He might miss a baseball game. Another taped clip from a mothership reporter. Keith thanks the tape.
#2: KO pretends to care about the children. Even MORE regurgitated video. Geeze. Robots and kids.
Keeping Tabs: Paris Hilton has a new attorney, petition to "free Paris Hilton." O.J. Simpson thrown out of a restaurant.
#1: Mo Rocca looking strangely like Keith's older brother. He just doesn't have the right glasses. Olby love of hating American "I-Dull" is even more exciting than ever. Snooze fest. Mo can't even save this segment, unless he announced he is Keith's brother.
In the Media Matters minute, Dick Morris of "Fox Noise" (ha! funnier! Blue Blog source: Media Matters). Another use of Dick. Penis Olbsession abounds. Silver to Phil Kent writing an Op-Ed for actually suggesting Media Matters is funded by George Soros. Throw in "Bill-O" attack #god knows what for also criticizing Media Matters. As regular Olbywatch readers know, Media Matters is Keith's primary source for nearly everything. As was the source for Mr. Kent: Blue Blog source: Media Matters. The gold goes Henrietta Holsman to replace the guy who left after the DC Madam Scandal [Ding!] for making racist sounding statements. (Blue Blog source: RawStory)
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's went through the roof to #2,609 at amazon.com, but "Culture Warrior" is #478. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome sadly remains unranked; O'Reilly's book is #519 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. Tuesday's Hour of Spin eeked out a second place finish in total viewers (by 32k over Ms. Zahn). As we know, "Man on Fan" Olbermann prefers that "money demo" that he has a massive crush on. Based on that, Tuesday's Hour of Spin was stunningly third with a humiliating 127k viewers, in the critical, beloved, all-important, coveted "key demo." That lock on second is as firm as ever. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [GUARDED]
UPDATE: video & transcript