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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
Just seconds into the opening spiel and we got the first "dick" reference, and a "St Rudy" bit that absolutely demands detailed analysis.
Rudy dared to criticize Bill Jefferson Clinton, a huge no-no on OlbyPlanet. Rudy said B.J. treated the first trade center attack as a crime rather than an act of war. Aha! Olbermahn's got him now, and cackled about how Rudy didn't treat it as an act of war either. Um, is Keithy Boy really this stupid? Does he believe mayors of cities can engage in warfare with foreign enemies? Do they have armies? How exactly would the mayor of New York pursue this "war"? Does Bathtub Boy spend even ten seconds on the logic of what he says, or does he just spout whatever sounds good to the gullible blue blog buffs?
But we digress. The spiel also brought us funny babies, the iPhone, Paris Hilton, and other noxious trivia. Yeah, it looks like it's time to lard on the celebrities and embrace the fluff. Those Nielsens have to be elevated somehow; they are entirely too limp.
#5: The White House won't release documents about "warrantless eavesdropping"; Olbermoronn doesn't mention that this program was discontinued months ago. Then he bitched a bit about why President Cheney doesn't have to turn over documents to some archivist, a lead-in to tonight's episode of Olby and The Perfessor. Predictably, the Perfessor found another "federal crime" he could pin on Bush--it wouldn't be a Perfessor appearance without him cooking up something on that stove. We'll tell you what neither of these Einsteins bothered to mention. Neither the Vice-President nor the President has to turn over documents to an inferior executive officer. It's a little thing called chain of command. Lesson over. Great thanks. More Cheney bashing with Robinson followed.
#4: Rudy throws Bill Clinton "under the bus" [Ding!]. Yes, it's back to Project Rudy, Herr Olbermann's attempt to SwiftBoat Giuliani, tonight with the help of a rabid, long-time Rudy basher. Real journalists, media critics, and people who believe in the true legacy of Edward R Murrow might wonder why Oralmann never actually talks to Giuliani. Or a spokesman. Why doesn't anyone ever get to says anything in defense of Rudy? Ah, but then you see, you wouldn't have propaganda. You'd have journalism. And that isn't allowed on The Hour of Spin. So we get Sir Olbermahn riding in on his white horse to do a hatchet job on Rudy, who committed the unpardonable sin: he criticized Bill Clinton. His Rudy-hating guest (identified as someone who "covered" Giuliani, concealing his own blatant partisanship) played along. It got to the point where Olby started quizzing his sock-puppet about Giuliani's personal religious faith. Hey, nothing is beyond the pale when a Monkeymann target has an (R) after his name. Of course, no interview with Giuliani. Or a supporter. Or a spokesman. Or anyone to say even one word in his behalf. That is against the law on OlbyPlanet. They name streets after guys like Oralmann: "One-Way".
#3: Another Will Farrell funny baby video, with an embedded O'Reilly attack (#202, if anyone's counting). Yes, that was the #3 story: the "funny" video (in its entirety) and a slam at Mr Bill. #2: The iPhone (regurgitated video from the ratings-challenged NBC News). Plus baseball cards (that'll grab viewers in that coveted, all-important, beloved, key demo!), and a plug for Olby on Letterman. #1: Paris Hilton.
In the Media Matters Minute, Rupert Murdoch, Rupert Murdoch (Blue Blog Source: Raw Story), and--yes--the Olbsession manifests itself for the 203rd time. The last included a marvelous Olbermann lie, where he claimed O'Reilly "authenticated" the Swift Boat charges against Kerry. He did no such thing, of course, but the statutes of OlbyPlanet state that making stuff up is permitted if it's to smear Bill O'Reilly.
That lock Herr Olbermann has on second place? It looks like Nancy Grace has learned the combination.
Tuesday night 8PM - P2+ (25-54)
The O'Reilly Factor - 2,376,000 viewers (484,000)
Paula Zahn - 536,000 viewers (122,000)
Countdown w/ Olbermann - 624,000 viewers (195,000)
Nancy Grace - 901,000 viewers (332,000)
Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name roars along at #7,314 at amazon.com, while "Culture Warrior" is #657. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome remains sunken below the ranking radar at Barnes & Noble; O'Reilly's book is #1,098 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 1 [LOW]