Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• PRESIDENT BUSH AND CONGRESS: Howard Fineman, Newsweek senior Washington correspondent and MSNBC political analyst; James Moore, huffingtonpost.com contributor and co-author of "Bush's Brain"
• WATERBOARDING: Bruce Fein, fmr. Reagan associate attorney general
• 2008 ELECTION: Craig Crawford, CQPolitics.com columnist and MSNBC political analyst; Jim Morris, political humorist and impressionist

Something Olbermann This Way Comes: The President wants a "rubber stamp" [Ding!], he's going to (gasp!) issue administrative orders, Mukasey nomination is in "crisis" [Ding!], "Saint Rudy" [Ding!], Roger Ailes [Ding!], and more. It's hump day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: "Mister" Bush is destroying democracy because he is going to issue administrative orders. Horrors! No President has ever done that before! "Mister" Bush "bashes" Democrats. "Mister" Bush is running the country "by executive fiat". Olby suggested the Congress should stop all funding to the Executive Branch. The Pundit for All Occasions was again a bland sycophant. Great thanks.

Karen Hughes resigned. Reference to Blackwater [Ding!]. "Bush's Brain" [Ding!] Guy brought in to advance the notion that Ms Hughes is delusional and a butt-kissing toady and "Mister" Bush wants to be a dictator. Great thanks. Teaser for upcoming political segment: Joe Biden in the debate takes a shot at Giuliani. (On OlbyPlanet, that is the big news from the event.)

#4: The AG nomination fight. Clips from anti-AG Democrats: Leahy (D), Durbin (D). Clips from pro-AG Republicans: don't be silly, this is The Hour of Spin; you know Olby ain't gonna be fair or balanced. Fein was again miseadingly introduced as a "former Reagan" administration member, but we at Olbermann Watch know of his sharp turn to the left. If he hadn't taken that fork in the road, he never would have arrived at OlbyPlanet. "Blank check" [Ding!]. Great thanks.

#3: Debate politics. Yep, the Big News out of the debate is: Biden attacked Giuliani! Oh, and Giuliani is a plagiarist. Debate clip: Biden attacks Giuliani, Giuliani responds. Hillary tried to "split the middle" on illegal alien drivers licenses; clips of that exchange. As Olbermann's Brain chuckled onto the set, Merkle started off by asking several questions about... Hillary? Nope. Biden vs Giuliani! Now we know Keithy's plan to spin Hillary's embarrassing performance--change the subject and launch Project Rudy yet again! Then it was on to Obama, Edwards, and finally the licenses issue. When Oralmann started out "It sounds to me, and maybe I'm being naive..." you know The Spin Starts Here. Oh, she was looking for an ad-hoc solution to an unsolved problem, she was "unfairly hounded", yada yada yada. Will Fat Ass ever get his head out of that Clinton orafice? (Hint: No.) Great thanks.

After a "Fixed News" [Ding!] reference: #2: Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan. #1: Political comedy with Jim Morris with lots of fake laughter from Dan Olbermahn. In the Media Matters Minute, Herr Olbermahn went after John Gibson of "Fox Noise" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) and Mort Kondracke of "Fixed News" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters). Yep, another night of straight from the Media Matters website to Dan Olbermahn's teleprompter.

Dogs That Did Not Bark: Good old Bathtub Boy. Whenever there's a terror-related arrest, he's right there to ridicule it. Like he did with the Fort Dix plotters, the "morons", according to Olby. The "supposed plot" doesn't "hold together that well", he ruled. It was just a "dubious fantasy". But what do you know? The first of the Fort Dix Six today entered a plea of guilty. And all of sudden Edward R Olbermoronn has nothing to say on the subject. Not a word. This is why we call it The Hour of Spin.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #12,433 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #6,552. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome dropped to #87,151; O'Reilly's book is #2,428 there,--and it's now out in paperback! Amazon lists the paperback at #372, while the paperback edition of Oralmann's book is, well, only a gleaming wish in Krazy Keith's eye. On Tuesday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann eked out a second place finish again, but still lost overwhelmingly to the eeevil O'Reilly, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 7 [HIGH]

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• DEMS IN IOWA: Richard Wolffe
• PROJECT RUDY: Eugene Robinson, Washington Post
• FEMA FAKES: Lawrence O'Donnell, Huffington Post
• BASEBALL, BILLO, and BRAINWASHING

Another opening, another spiel: Barack "gets tough" with Hillary, but that presents "problems", like Obama's anti-gay preacher pal. Giuliani "joined at the hip" with Bush and that will "sink" him. Plus FEMA, baseball, and more. It's a blue Monday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Iowa moves up its caucus as Obama gets tough on Hill. Edwards is "painting" Hillary as an insider. State polls are close. Olby immediately said Obama criticizing Madame Clinton is "a double-edged sword" and plugged tomorrow's MSLSD debate. Then he brought up the preacher who claimed he's "cured" of homosexuality, and The Wolffe Man simpered that Barack has "tied himself in knots". Great thanks.

Next, Project Rudy. He's a Bush clone! He's a Cheney clone! Next thing, Merkle will claim he's a Ted Bundy clone. He's an authoritarian! He'll torture! As lefty Robinson parrotted OlbySpin, Oralmann waxed philosophical about people who are so dumb as to favor Rudy's policies. Great thanks.

#4: FEMA Fakes! Wait, wasn't this also #4 last Friday? Well yeah, but that dead horse still has a few floggings left in it. Cronyism! Nepotism! Low standards! "Mister" Bush is focusing on "replenishing his coffers". The "Bush doctrine" is "preemptive stupidity". So the architect of the phony presser will not get a planned appointment, and to chew it over we had another episode of Dirty Olby and Crazy Larry. (See The List!) Olbermahn referenced "the Bush habit of promoting failures upwardly". Ah, that great wordsmith, ever so careful to specify promoting upwardly, as opposed to promoting downwardly. Great thanks.

After a passing attack on Fred Thompson we got #3: Baseball--finally a topic on which Merkle has a modicum of competence. #2: Oprah, O.J. #1: Bigfoot bears or something.

In the Media Matters Minute, Bathtub Boy attacked his bete noir, the eeevil O'Reilly (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters). Plus the "right wing" [Ding!] "lunatic fringer" [Ding!] David Horowitz (Blue Blog Source: Talking Points Memo) and the Department of Homeland Security. Deja vu all over again.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #25,196 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #5,483. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome dropped to #86,126; O'Reilly's book is #2,528 there,--and it's now out in paperback! Amazon lists the paperback at #297, while the paperback edition of Oralmann's book is, well, nonexistent. On Friday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann finally eked out a second place finish, but of course he still lost overwhelmingly to the eeevil O'Reilly, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• PRES. BUSH'S DOMESTIC AND INTERNATIONAL ISSUES: Howard Fineman, Newsweek senior Washington correspondent and MSNBC political analyst; Flynt Leverett, New America Foundation senior fellow and fmr. National Security Council senior director for Middle East Affairs
• MORE BILL O'REILLY CONTROVERSY: Rachel Maddow, Air America radio host
• CELEBRITY LATEST: Michael Musto, Village Voice

Keith P Ottermann chanted the opening spell: Confundus! Bush Petulancy! 7-Year Old! Dissendium! Fraud! Scourgify! Bisexuality! Morsmorde! It's Harry Potter Day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Petulance! Rubber Stamp! [Ding!] Blank Check! [Ding!] Ghosts! Provocative! Howard Finnegan and Marcus Flynt Leverett reinforced the powerful majick of P Ottermann's incantations. Langlock!

#4: FEMA Fakes! Jeff Gannon! [Ding!] Nitwits! Propaganda! E.J. Dionne joined the mystic circle. Ferula!

#3: Olbsession! (Sacred Scroll Source: Think Progress!) Incestuous amplification! Rachel Muggle, from Err America (she hasn't been on The Hour of Spin since... well, since the last show Olby did). Together they took unproven allegations as fact and spoke again and again of the eeevil O'Rowley. Racist! Mackris! Double Mackris! Right-Wing! [Ding!] Hypocrisy! Falafel! [Ding!] Psychological Treatment! Fox Noise! [Ding!] Cistem Aperio!

Fidelius!

#2: Di, Kidman. #1: Humorous Britney exchanges with the castle's resident jester, Merlin Musto. Rictusempra!

In the nightly reading from the Book of Curses and Counter-Curses: Glenn Beck (Sacred Scroll Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters), and worst, Dana Perino (Sacred Scroll Source: Daily Kos, Keith's favorite charity). Oppugno! Another week of battling the dark forces behind him, Keith P Ottermann left Koswarts for a weekend with Katy Bell Tur. Evanesco!

If it's Friday, it's our weekly assessment of Krazy Keith's masculinity. This week Monkeymann attacked Fox and other broadcasters 16 times. Olby's source (Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) criticized (MS)NBC six times, but again, Keithy protected his corporate masters with zero criticisms. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -32 [Dumbledore limp].

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #23,349 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #1,296. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome dropped to #57,167; O'Reilly's book is #2,611 there,--and it's now out in paperback! Amazon lists it at #199, while the paperback edition of Oralmann's screed is at... um, let's see, it's at... oh wait, never mind. There is no paperback edition. On Wednesday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann again came in a poor third, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Evanesco! Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 7 [HIGH]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Guest Host: David Shuster

Topics/Guests:

• U.S. IMPOSES SANCTIONS ON IRAN: Joe Cirincione, Center for American Progress senior fellow and author of Bomb Scare; Chris Cillizza, Washingtonpost.com national political reporter
• PROBLEMS FOR RUDY GIULIANI: Wayne Barrett, Village Voice senior editor and author of Grand Illusion: The Untold Story of Rudy Giuliani and 9/11
• MARIE OSMOND BLAMES THE FIRES FOR HER FAINTING SPELL: Christian Finnegan, VH-1's Best Week Ever

Olbermoronn is on the warpath,
Malkin's latest just heightened his wrath.
He's not up to the struggle,
It's too much for a muggle.
So tonight Olby soaks in his bath.

Straight from Hillary Clinton's Media Matters to Oralmann's teleprompter.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• IRAQ WAR AFFECTING ABILITY TO FIGHT FIRES IN CALIFORNIA:  Brian Williams, managing editor and host of 'NBC Nightly News'; Lt. Gov. John Garamendi (D-Calif.)
• REPUBLICAN PARTY: Rachel Maddow, Air America radio host
• 2008 ELECTION: Dana Milbank, Washington Post national political reporter and MSNBC political analyst

Burn, baby, burn! It's another opening spiel: "Fox Noise" [Ding!], yada yada. Sigh, it's a wearisome hump day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Bush administration was "warned" about the dangers of fires. Yeah, and so? Olby's Big Question: Isn't the Iraq war hindering efforts against the fire? Because, after all, 3,000 of 17,000 CA guardsmen are overseas. Yep, you got the Talking Point of the night. Brian Williams suffered the indignity of having to talk to Fat Ass, but--and this is intriguing--as soon as Williams came on the screen, all the talk about Iraq, conspiracies, it's Bush's fault, etc, suddenly disappeared. They spoke only of the facts of the fires and how the effort is going.

Did Brian tell Olby he wouldn't stand for any of that crap, or was Herr Olbermann afraid that Brian might not tow the OlbyPlanet line? Either way, Krazy Keith was put in his place by a real journalist.

Next up was Garamendi: Olby asked a question and the guy spouted off incredible run-on jumbo paragraphs of talking points. Note how his answers were almost verbatim the same words he tried to use in an earlier interview:

Quite a different exchange than the one with "journalist" Edward R Olbermann, who acted like nothing more than a microphone stand as Garamendi prattled, and who could only snark about the President's "photo-op kit". (Wasn't he whining that the President did not get on the ground soon enough during Katrina? This is called Olbypocrisy.) Great thanks.

Oh, we almost forgot: yes, we have updated The List. Check it out.

Another reference to "terrorpublicans" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: Daily Kos) led into #4: the terrorpublicans [Ding!] and the obligatory attack on "Fox Noise" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress). Has the US government prevented any terror attacks? Why no, sez Olbermoronn. Even the Library Tower attack was a phony, a story he has repeated over and over, because Merkle is, as we know, a liar:

Rachel Maddow of Err America was there to participate in Krazy Keith's incestuous amplification, ramping it up by lying that Fox reported that "Al Qaeda started the fires". Olby was so worked up he almost soiled himself. "Terrorpublicans" [Ding!]. "Mister" Bush. "Who is George Bush kidding?" Bush is in a "bubble" [Ding!], and the "bubble" [Ding!] makes him a "bubble-head" [Ding!]. Great thanks.

#3: Project Rudy: how dare the "obnoxious" Giuliani root for the Boston Red Sox? Yes, this was an entire segment on The Hour of Spin. Oh and Romney mistakenly referred to UBL as Barrack Obama. According to Oralmann that means he's too stupid to be in office. Of course this got covered because you remember all the interviews and analysis Keithy Boy indulged in when Ted Kennedy made a similar flub. You don't? Oh, sorry.

#2: O.J. Simpson, Britney Spears. #1: Taped wildfire video.

In the Media Matters Minute it was another trifecta: every victim was an Republican or a conservative. Glenn Beck (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters), Rick Santorum (Blue Blog Source: Carpetbagger Report), and worst: Michelle Malkin (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters).

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #20,268 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #1,682. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome dropped to #56,578; O'Reilly's book is #2,423 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Tuesday the fires inflated cable news ratings, but while the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann did get a bump, that rising tide lifted all boats, so not only did Olby lose to the eeevil O'Reilly, he came in a poor third both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• THE FEAR CARD: Richard Wolffe, MSLSD
• GO-GO-GONZALES: John McKay
• GOP POLITICS: Craig Crawford
• HARRY POTTER IS ANTI-ESTABLISHMENT: Sure he is

Keith Oralmann barked the opening spiel: It's the "fear card": money "the fund the deaths of Americans", the Veep "comes out of his cave", Valerie Plame (again), Gonzales (again), GOP debate, wildfires, and more. It's blue Monday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: The "third world war" [Ding!]. Cheney the "dark Lord" "rattling sabres". Will Democrats "rubber stamp" funding request? The Wolffe Man simpered that they're throwing in the towel. Olby referenced the "terrorpublicans" (that's so stupid it gets a [Ding!]). Of course he lifted it from elsewhere (Blue Blog Source: Daily Kos). Valerie Plame's identity was revealed by "aides to both Bush and Cheney". Um, her name was revealed by an aide to Colin Powell. That part of the story is censored on OlbyPlanet. Regurgitated video of VP, plus plug for her on The Hour of Spin tomorrow. Gonzo again; a fired US Attorney thinks AG could be prosecuted. News. Other fired US Attorneys disagree. Not news.

#4: GOP Presidential politics. The "far right [Ding!] of the far rights [Ding!]". OlbyLogic analyzes the debate: criticizing Hillary is bad politics because it helps her. Olbermann's Brain chortled, sniggered, and cackled. Great thanks.

#3: California fires via taped report; Keithy Great Thanksed the tape. #2: Ellen and her dog, Kid Rock . #1: The politics of Harry Potter. We would have preferred the psychology of an allegedly grown man who obsesses over baseball cards and kiddie books. Not that it mattered much, as the highly intellectual discussion was cut off prematurely when somebody at MSLSD mercifully pulled the plug, leaving the last minute or two with nothing but color bars and an audio test tone.

In the Media Matters Minute it was another trifecta: every victim was an (R) or a Fox employee. Glenn Beck (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters), National Review (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress), and Bill O'Reilly. Hold it, stop the tivo! What's this? Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly?!? Hey did we call it, or what?!!

Oh, Fat Ass also crowed about "beating" O'Reilly (actually an O'Reilly rerun) in a phony inflated demo that MSNBC itself doesn't even use. Merkle lost in the true numbers. We'll leave it up to you whether to count this as Another Olbermann Lie.

Dogs That Did Not Bark:

Michael Murphy. Of course if he had put underwear on someone's head or gunned down a few civilians Edward R Olbermoronn would have flogged the story for days. Instead, nothing. Disgraceful.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #10,478 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #1,581. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome sinking to #55,522; O'Reilly's book is #2,404 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Friday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann bordered on pulling off a coup. Yeah he lost horrendously to Mr Bill, almost, nearly, not quite finishing first in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Hold it, O'Reilly wasn't on Friday; they reran an old show. Oh well. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 5 [ELEVATED]

Happening now. The infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann will smear the participants tomorrow with cherry-picked video blipverts, so get your reactions to the proceedings in now.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• REPUBLICANS IN THE 2008 ELECTION: Richard Wolffe, Newsweek senior White House correspondent and MSNBC political analyst; Arianna Huffington, huffingtonpost.com editor
• "BROKEN GOVERNMENT": John Dean, fmr. Nixon White House counsel and author of "Broken Government"
• JOE TORRE SPEAKS: Bob Costas, NBC Sports
• LATEST BRITNEY SPEARS NEWS: Paul F. Tompkins, VH-1 contributor and comedian

It's an end-of-the-week spiel: "lunatic fringe" [Ding!], "right wing" [Ding!], Limbaugh (again!), another O'Reilly attack (again!), Joe Torre, Britney (again!).... It's casual Friday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: OlbyPlanet wish fulfillment: "theocrats" will split the GOP, electing a Dem. KO Kandidate Kapsules: Giuliani is "twice-divorced", Mitt Romney is "a Mormon", McCain is "sucking up", yada yada yada. The Wolffe Man simpered about the "narrow" values of the "Tony Perkins crowd". Oralmann declared McCain's speech to the values voters inappropriate: a "senior express moment". Great thanks.

Then it was on to attacking Limbaugh (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters). Again. It's S-Chip. Again. Captain, the space time continuum seems to be caught in an endless loop! Herr Olbermoronn introduced Arianna Huffington as "my friend" and a full segment of Rush attacks ("idiot", "failed baseball executive") followed. He's attacking 12-year-old boys "and I'm not talking about Foley or Craig", bellowed Merkle to Zsa Zsa. Geez, Bathman. To paraphrase your sidekick The Boy Wonder, why this obsession over Rush? When did a Rush comment ever kill anyone? No mention made of the millions Rush just raised for charity, and will match out of his own pocket. Isn't that news? Not on OlbyPlanet. Great thanks.

#4: Olbermann's Criminal Rehabilitation Program convened another meeting with its star member, felon John Dean. It didn't take long for the obligatory comparison: "Nixon!" [Ding!] Great thanks. #3: Joe Torre discussion with Olby and his sidekick Costas. #2: David Copperfield, Lindsay Lohan, Brokeback Mountain. #1: Britney Spears.

The Media Matters Minute: Attack on O'Reilly (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters). His crime? He had guests on his show who disagreed with him and actually criticized him! Why is that so stunning? It isn't, but we can see how it would be to someone who broadcasts from the sheltered echo chamber of OlbyPlanet. Worst: "lunatic fringe" [Ding!]Hugh Hewitt (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress).

If it's Friday, it's our weekly assessment of Krazy Keith's masculinity. This week Monkeymann attacked Fox and other broadcasters 19 times. Olby's source (Media Matters) criticized (MS)NBC nine times, but again, Keithy protected his corporate masters with zero criticisms. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -38 [wet noodle limp].

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #15,888 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #1,752. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble has the OlbyTome sinking to #54,809; O'Reilly's book is #2,186 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Thursday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann slipped again into third place in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Can a new Special Education Komment be in the works? Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]

Starting Monday you can expect fresh graphics on The Hour of Spin.

While the show will have new digs in The Big Apple, don't expect many new guests. Herr Olbermann will continue to specialize in Democrat politicos, Err America talk show hosts, and leftist writers. There will be more attacks on Fox, Glenn Beck, and O'Reilly (well over 300 up to this point), a plethora of "Mister" Bushes, and Countdown's signature feature: stories lifted off the blue blogs--e.g. Think Progress, Daily Kos (KO's favorite charity), Hillary Clinton's Media Matters--and sent straight to Oralmann's teleprompter.

There may be a new coat of paint, but it's the same old Hour of Spin.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• HOUSE FAILS TO OVERRIDE PRES. BUSH'S VETO OF THE S-CHIP BILL: Jonathan Alter, Newsweek senior editor; Rachel Maddow, Air America radio host

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• PRES. BUSH'S PRESS CONFERENCE: Dana Milbank, Washington Post national political reporter
• S-CHIP VOTE AND THE GOP: Bo and Dara Wilkerson, family smeared
• ELLEN DEGENERES DOG DRAMA: Joel McHale, E!'s "The Soup"

Another opening, another spiel: The President's "unnerving" news conference--he said "world war III"; "reality" is "increasingly irrelevant" to Bush; S-CHIP slimes [Ding!]; Larry Craig again; Ellen's dog; and more. Doesn't all this seem unnervingly familiar? It's Groundhog Day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Hah! KO was incommunicado due to "technical problems" but Melissa Somebody promised to speak "Keith's own words". "Mister" Bush approval rating is down. Damn, KO is back within a minute. A plethora of "Mister" Bushes: 12 in just the ten minutes before the deja vu appearance of Dana Milbank, without weird wardrobe. Olby compared "Mister" Bush to Nixon [Ding!] and suggested he is unbalanced and wonders if he "still has all his faculties". Dana smoothly distanced himself from Oralmann's fevered fantasies. Fat Ass wouldn't give it up, and wondered if Bush was in the throes of fundamentalist extremism. Once again Milbank distanced himself, but still got Great Thanksed.

#4: The "far-right" [Ding!] "sliming" [Ding!] children again. Once again the exploitation continues on The Hour of Spin. This really is Groundhog Day! "Smears" from the "right wing" [Ding!] and "right wing water carriers" [Ding!]. Clip of Pelosi (D) echoing OlbySpin. Lots of talk about "Mister" Bush's veto but no mention that he too wants to increase S-CHIP funding. That's Too Much Information on OlbyPlanet. "Slimed!" [Ding!]. "Sliming" [Ding!] by "right wing attack dogs" [Ding!]. Dad wants S-CHIP coverage for every child in the US, regardless of income. He and Mom were Great Thanksed and Pleasured.

#3: Larry Craig again. An entire segment on how much he knows about using the internet, with lots of regurgitated video and audio. Orthicon Sominex. #2: Slobbering over Al Gore, Colbert for President, Star Wars, O.J. #1: Ellen's dog. In the Media Matters Minute, Keith Oralmann attacked Susan Orr (R) (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress), Mitt Romney (R) (Blue Blog Source: Talking Points Memo), and worst: Ann Coulter (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters).

Dogs That Did Not Bark...

...for the second day in a row:

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name plummeted to #51,383 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" stands at #1,251. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #54,448; O'Reilly's book is #2,206 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. After seeing Tuesday's numbers, "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann will probably order his writers to crank out a new Special Education Komment. He came in a humiliating fourth place, losing even to a hit and run killer on CNN, in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 14 [DANGER!!]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• VERIZON TURNS OVER PHONE RECORDS: Howard Fineman, Newsweek senior Washington correspondent and MSNBC political analyst; John Dean, fmr. Nixon White House counsel and author of "Broken Government"
• FISA: Paul Krugman, New York Times columnist, Princeton University professor, and author of "The Conscience of a Liberal"
• ANGRY CHIEF OF STAFF: Rachel Maddow, Err America radio host

The ferocious Keith Monkey Man Olbermann asks, "Can you spy on me now?" The government wants all of your information; Howie in! Convicted felon rehab! "Swiftboating" [Ding!] of Graeme Frost and Sen. McConnel calling out Paul Krugman. "Bloggers did the investigating." Paul Krugman to opine on the matters. More Republican bashing YouTube style. More Britney Spears coverage. Yay.

#5: "Uncle Sam is Watching You." Verizon is being an evil Bush crony but they may be the "good guys." Democrats are considering blanket immunity for these telecom companies - gasp! Con. John Conyers (D-Land of Oz) mention. Howie Fineman is brought in to play liberal partner in crime. Congress doesn't know the extent of the program. White House wants immunity to protect its "domestic spying." Administration is perfectly willing to "diss the congress" says Howie. "Has not the smell test on retroactive immunity failed?" asks Olby. Congress Markey who chairs a committee is going to have more hearings. More hearings? Geeze, I thought congress had too few. We definitely need more. "Does this underscore - scream the value of congressional oversight?" Olbermann might as well cry like a baby.

Nixon White House Counsel, Convicted Felon and Disbarred lawyer John Dean. Countdown star. I bet you can imagine where this is going. White House is trying to "overpower" the congress. "Lots of evidence of violations of the law." Right. Constitutional Scholar Keith Olbermann tries to talk about ex post facto laws but Dean, ever the scholar himself, smacks Olby down as he is wrong as usual. "Nightmare scenario" that even George Bush could be picked up in one these raids. Surprisingly uneventful. Great Thanks.

#4: SCHIP program continues. More about the "swiftboating" [Ding!] of Graeme Frost. The "right wing could not get lower." Paul Krugman, author of "Conscience of a Liberal." Does anyone detect the irony here? Krugman ruminates about the "fake" scandals in the 90s, like that "phony" campaign finance scandal and the Buddhist monks. Krugman thanks Olby by saying, "You, I and the progressive blogosphere were able to mount a quick counterattack." Does Keith want to be associated with liars and smear artists at DailyKos and their compatriots? Is this a tacit admission vis a vis silence by Der Fuhrer of being a "progressive?" Hmmm. "Who do people who proclaim themselves pro-life...they literally want them, in Graeme Frost's case, call for public hanging...is there any straight line in there?" "They hate the idea we are our brother's keepers," says Krugman. Krugman says that Democrats put a "human face" on "socialized medicine."
"It drives them carry." "What is the impact on the four million kids who won't be covered?" asks Herr Olbermann. Gee, that's not a loaded question. What a pleasure.

Oddball: Mini pigs. Drag race.

#3: Republican bashing as usual. Chief of Staff for a Republican activist gets "YouTubed" by a moveon.org hack. Chief of Staff uses famous "Right Wing Slur" which is "anti-American (the slur is the aforementioned)." Rachel Maddow for the usual spin cycle. "Far-right" again [Ding!] Blabber about provoking and annoying your political opponents. Macaca again [Ding!] Great thanks. Yawn.

#2: Keeping Tabs: Ellen dog scandal. Kate and Prince William.

In the Media Matters minute, Bill-O getting the bronze for another media matters smear, MediaMatters. Silver: "Comedian" Rush Limbaugh for "threatening a journalist" on the Huff and Puff HuffPuff. Gold: More Huff and Puff material. Meh.

#1: Britney Spears. Woman bashing. Creepy Michael Musto talks about anal bleaching. Britney wants to show her "hoo-ha" to the world. Usual.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's came in at a stellar #13,538 on amazon.com, but "Culture Warrior" is #710. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome still can't find a rank at Barnes and Noble; O'Reilly's book is #745 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. Monday's Hour of Spin had Olby in second. Congrats. Source. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 1 [LOW]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• CIVIL RIGHTS IN JEOPARDY: Jonathan Turley, George Washington University law professor and constitutional law expert
• THE SWIFT BOATING OF GRAEME FROST: Bonnie and Halsey Frost, Graeme Frost’s parents

Opening spiel: Good news from Iraq? Don't believe it. "Conservatives without conscience" cause a "nightmare". Larry Craig yet again; Mitt "threw him under the bus" [Ding!], yada yada yada. It's blue Monday at Olbermann Watch and the bells are ringing.

#5: "Mister" Bush doesn't want a victory in Iraq because it would mean he would have to leave. If Al Qaeda is 60-70% diminished, said Olby, well so what? That means they're still 30-40% not diminished. Dana Milbank, minus multicolored mufti, said any improvement in Iraq undermines the success of the surge. No, don't try to figure it out, it's OlbyLogic. It must be, because Olby said it puts the White House in a corner! By the way, up is down, and dry is wet. Great thanks.

Time for HuffPo's Jon Soltz to take OlbySpin into hyperdrive. These generals shouldn't be saying stuff like this because wascally Wepublicans will exploit it for political gain. Oh, and "Where you sit is where you stand". O.K. Olbermoronn said the casualty numbers may be down "but they haven't hit zero". Geez, that's even true of members of the US Senate, Fat Ass. The far-left Soltz was so enamored of OlbySpin that he told Oralmann: "I'm going to start using your stuff!" You know he got Great Thanksed.

After a reference to the "right-wing lunatic fringe" [Ding!] came #4: The Big Bad Pentagon in "George Bush's America". They're injecting people with "dangerous" drugs (Blue Blog Source: Daily Kos, Keith's favorite charity). This is an allegation in a lawsuit, but was reported as fact by Edward R Olbermahn. Natch. Time for Olby and The Perfessor. More Pentagon "spying". Keyword: "abuse" (used by The Perfessor five times in one form or other). Great thanks.

After yet another "lunatic fringe" [Ding!] we got #3: The "right wing" [Ding!] wants Graeme Frost to "die" (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress). It's the fury of the "right wing" [Ding!]. Rush Limbaugh "spreading lies", Mitch McConnell "reportedly" (weasel word) doing so too. The "lunatic fringe" [Ding!]. No mention of the Frosts' three automobiles. Much talk about what if they didn't have the S-CHIP program, which is odd, because neither Democrats nor Republicans have proposed doing away with it (straw man). Great phony-sympathy-style Thanks.

#2: Larry Craig (regurgitated video from the network mothership) with another "thrown under the bus" [Ding!], which Herr Olbermahn apparently thinks is a phrase original with him (no, it just seems that way after hearing it for the 89th time)...plus O.J. #1: Rudy and space aliens ("they're meaner than Republicans"). "Lunatic fringe" [Ding!].

In the Media Matters Minute, Olby attacked Michelle Malkin (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress), Lindsay Graham (R) (Blue Blog Source: Crooks & Liars) throwing Gen Sanchez "under the bus" [Ding!], and worst: Roger Ailes (Blue Blog Source: Oliver Willis of Hillary Clinton's Media Matters).

Dogs That Did Not Bark: Well, we could ask why Edward R Olbermann did an interview with Hillary Clinton and never asked one question about the Hsu financial scandal. But then, he would have to report on it, wouldn't he? Oh well, then how about Gen Sanchez? Mr Merkle trumpeted the General's criticism of the Iraq War as headline news from a genuine expert (i.e. the man in charge when the country was de-Bathified, and during the Abu Ghraib scandal). But Herr Olberoronn conveniently left out half of what Sanchez said. Could that be because it boomerangs right back on OlbyPlanet? We report, you decide.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #33,079 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" stands at #1,198. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #43,276; O'Reilly's book is #2,368 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Friday, "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann just barely beat a hit-and-run driver on CNN for second place, but still lost overwhelmingly to his nemesis the eeevil Mr Bill, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 1 [LOW]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• SEC. RICE MEETS WITH PRESIDENT PUTIN: Gov. Bill Richardson, (D-N.M.)
• SHAWN HORNBECK'S FAMILY WANTS AN APOLOGY FROM BILL O'REILLY: Pam and Craig Akers, Hornbeck's parents
• POLITICAL GOSSIP: Mo Rocca, comedian

Something Olbermann This Way Comes: The Supreme Court stole the election from Gore, who won the Peace Prize. Obama vs Hillary. Sanchez blasts Bush. Another Democrat interviewed. Another O'Reilly attack. It's televised Sominex, but we'll liven things up with our weekly assessment of Keith Olbermann's masculinity. It's casual Friday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Gore wins Nobel. Top Story! Big News! Oh, and apropos of nothing, "Mister" Bush is the "worst President ever!" Olby brings up Gore's Oscar-winning "documenterary". Lefty Alter said he won't run for Prez, but his endorsement would have meaning. Great thanks.

Barack criticizes Hillary. Milbank, absent awful accutrements, knew what to say: it's "desperation" by Obama, while Olby dragged out the old standby, a "rookie mistake". KO defended Hillary's plan to start her foreign policy before she is sworn in, and dispensed the ritual Great Thanks.

#4: Gen Sanchez speaks against the progress of the war. Secretary Rice re Iran. Of course, the only opinion sought by Herr Olbermahn was from a Democrat Presidential candidate, Bill Richardson. Are you still checking The List? Just updated tonight. It's why they call Keithy's partisan hack fest The Hour of Spin. Tough questions pummelled by Edward R Olbermahn included: "Your reactions to Gen Sanchez's remarks today? If you'd be so kind." "How do you propose to fix the damage that 'Mister' Bush has done to the military". Yada yada yada. Oh, Richardson was wearing a flag pin. Apparently Fat Ass forgot to berate him about it like he did Lou Dobbs. Richardson was both Great Thanksed and Pleasured.

#3: Another O'Reilly attack (a genuine no-prize to whomever knows which number this is). The latest wrinkle is Olbermahn's exploitation of the Hornbeck family to further his diseased Olbsession. Geez, Keithy. To paraphrase your sidekick The Boy Wonder, why this obsession over O'Reilly? When did an O'Reilly comment ever kill someone? You do remember this, right?

It's one thing to turn commentary about an ongoing investigation into part of Monkeymann's paranoid ravings about O'Reilly; that's the kind of voodoo journalism that has vaulted the discredited baseball card collector into his position of miserable ratings and low esteem. But to drag the Hornbeck family onto the air and try to force words in their mouth is something else all together. For Oralmann to try his traditional ventriloquist routine with them--under these circumstances--is the mark of a swine. And thus just another day at the office for the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann.

#2: Anna Nicole Smith, Britney Spears. #1: Knee-slapping hilarity with Mo Rocca. In the Media Matters Minute, Herr Olbermann attacked Terry Jeffrey of the "lunatic fringe" [Ding!] Human Events (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters). His crime? He said Ann Coulter is not antisemitic. Geez, Bathman, there are Jewish writers who agree with him, but of course you know better. Worst person was (yawn!) you-know-who (Blue Blog Source: Crooks & Liars). Left-wing smears, direct from the web page to Bathtub Boy's teleprompter. Only on OlbyPlanet.

If it's Friday, it's our weekly assessment of Krazy Keith's masculinity. During this four-day week Monkeymann attacked Fox and other broadcasters 25 times. Olby's source (Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) criticized (MS)NBC four times, but again, Keithy protected his corporate masters with zero criticisms. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -50 [ultra-limp].

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name plummeted #25,315 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" has risen to #668. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #44,290; O'Reilly's book is #2,037 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann benefitted from CNN fill-in programming on Thursday. Mr Merkle came in second, though he still lost overwhelmingly to his nemesis the eeevil Mr Bill, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 4 [GUARDED]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• FISA FICTIONS: Howard Fineman, MSLSD; Felon Dean
• REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES SLAMMED: Chris Cillizza, Washington Post
• THE EVIL FAR RIGHT [Ding!]: Rachel Maddow, Err America

Yeah, there was an opening spiel. Yeah, Keith bellowed it like a snake-oil salesman at a traveling carnival. Yeah it mentioned "Mister" Bush, Cheney the "tool", the "lunatic right-wing fringe" [Ding!], yada yada yada. But we're more interested in the Dogs That Did Not Bark. Because we katch Keith in Another Olbermann Lie. Details as soon as we dispense with another Hour of Spin. It's hump day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: "Petulant" "Mister" Bush "drools" over spying. Quote from Conyers (D). No Quotes from (R)s. Pundit for All Occasions says Bush isn't "paying attention", and Democrats are spineless if they don't fight the eeevil one. Great thanks. Olby lied about eavesdropping on "US citizens without warrants", and when that lie gets trotted out again, so does the star pupil of the Olbermann Criminal Rehabilitation Program, the felon John Dean. Oh and this is the first of a series pimping his new book! You will forgive us if we don't transcribe his drivel. KO wanted to know just how Cheney was so "nefariously" prepared to take advantage of 9/11 right after it happened. Was it "coincidental"? Hey, Fat Ass, say it loud and say it proud: "9/11 Was An Inside Job!" Great thanks.

#4: The Republican debate, where every answer was some sort of flub or mistake or gaffe. Romney stumbled, McCain was irresponsible, Giuliani made up stats (Cillizza straightened Dan Olbermahn out on that last one). Olby reference to the "radical religious right" [Ding!]. Chris didn't get Great Thanksed but he did get Pleasured. Plug for tomorrow's blue-dress interview with Hillary Clinton (D).

#3: Hit piece on Limbaugh, Malkin (who wrote this), and the "radical right" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Sources: Daily Kos and Think Progress). "Water carriers" [Ding!], the "right wing" [Ding!], the "far right" [Ding!], "water carriers" [Ding!], inhuman "creatures"--and that's not counting all the partisan spew from Rachel. Great thanks.

#2: Lindsay Lohan, Pam Anderson. #1: Reality tv. In the Media Matters Minute, Herr Olbermann attacked Chris Wallace and "Fixed News" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Sources: Crooks and Liars and Hillary Clinton's Media Matters), Bill O'Reilly and "Fox Noise" [Ding!] aka "Fixed News" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: Newspoodles), and Lou Dobbs of...CNN?!? How'd he get in there!

Dogs That Did Not Bark: Keith Olbermann's Foxation knows no bounds. Yesterday he attacked Fox News, and as usual he didn't tell the truth:

OLBERMORONN: Our fifth story on the "Countdown," the administration compromised a back-door channel into Islamic web sites so it could look like a bunch of big men on FOX News channel. It reviewed a route to an unreleased Osama bin Laden video. Of course, not long after FOX News found out, so did al Qaeda. Add the name SITE intelligence group, S-I-T-E, to the long list of counterterror assets sacrificed to Bush P.R. efforts. It's the Valerie Plame Wilson list, if you will.
The founder of the small privately run intelligence firm telling the "Washington Post" it gave two senior White House officials an advanced copy of the last, the latest, Osama bin Laden tape on the condition the administration would keep it secret until al Qaeda released the tape itself. The logic there impeccable not to give al Qaeda a hint that any terror group had a pipeline into one of its web homes.
But within hours, someone in the government had leaked the video and the transcript to FOX News. Apparently, even telling FOX about the SITE Intelligence Group's name. The sensitive data was leaked to other news organizations....
OLBERMORONN: This gets leaked first to FOX and then to others on September 7th. Anything around that date that might pass for a public relations motive to leak this?
DANA MILBANK: Well, I think it's pretty obvious. You beat O'Reilly in the ratings the night before. [Laughter] They need to give FOX a boost.

Guess what? Every reference to Fox News in that dialogue is untrue. Olby would have you believe that the administration leaked this to Fox, based on the Washington Post report. But once again Edward R Olbermann has made up "facts" and inserted them at will. The Post report never said the leak was to Fox or that Fox was first with this story:

By midafternoon, several television news networks reported obtaining copies of the transcript. A copy posted around 3 p.m. on Fox News's Web site referred to SITE and included page markers identical to those used by the group.

There's a reason why the Post never said what Olbermann claimed to be fact on Tuesday night. Because it wasn't true! Long before 3:00 pm, details about this Bin Laden tape were published on the web...and not by Fox. By ABC News! Note the publication time: 9:23 am, more than five hours before Fox. In fact, ABC had a leak about the Bin Laden tape the previous day. That's nearly 24 hours before, according to Oralmann, it was leaked "first to Fox"!

Indeed, the Washington Post itself did a second report that eliminated any doubt about who got the original leak:

...a transcript appeared on the ABC News Web site and later on the Fox News site.

The Post published this yesterday afternoon, yet the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann went on the air anyhow with his phony "leaked first to Fox" story. The Olbypologists will claim, oh he didn't have time to hear about the Post's second report. Well he's had a full 24 hours to hear about it, read it, and get it right. But tonight Edward R Olbermoronn let his smears stand, with not one syllable of retraction, correction, or apology. So we enter into the record yet Another Olbermann Lie.

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name is #19,726 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" has risen to #1,012. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #48,083; O'Reilly's book is #1,453 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann had what for him passes as a Big Night on Tuesday. He came in a distant second. Of course, he still lost overwhelmingly to his nemesis the eeevil Mr Bill, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 7 [HIGH]

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• LEAK AND DESTORY: Dana Milbank, Washington Post National Political Reporter
• THE WAR ON COUNTERTERROR: Evan Kohlmann, MSNBC Terrorism Analyst, former frequent FNC guest
• MINDING THE GOP: Chris Matthews, Host of Hardball
• SPYING ON US: Bruce Fein, Pres. Reagan's Dep. Assoc. Attorney General

Fresh from seeing his beloved Yankees lose (how sweet that was), Keith Oralmann prated through his opening spiel about another nexus of something. Clip of Press Secretary Dana Perinno. Democrats might vote to "hand over more of the constitution to the Whtie House." FISA vote. Project Rudy continues with an all important story about Rudy Giuliani booed at the Yankees game (must have made up for that loss, eh Keith?). Princess Diana again and outsourced Larry Craig puppet theater.



#5: No reason to have any doubts wondering whether or not the administration is more concerned with headlines to look good on Fox News Channel [Ding!] rather than fighting terrorists. Administration "compromised a back door channel into islamic websites to look like a bunch of hitmen on the Fox News Channel." Blah blah blah about SITE and Konspiracy Theory about obscene concern for good PR by Mister Bush. Fox News, Fox News, Fox! Fox! Fox! [Ding!] [Ding!] [Ding!] [Ding!] [Ding!]. Olbersturmfuhrer and his lackeys use excellent editing and nice manipulation to make Ms. Perrino like a liar at worst and clueless at best. Nice. Clips of Ms. Perrino. Too bad she's not a "personal friend" like Tony Snow. Welcome Dana Milbank, sans fancy habiliments. He sympathizes with Hauptmann over the tragic loss of the Yankees. Keithy is grateful. Another example of "incompetence" opines Milby. Frances Townsend snarky attack: she appears on television everywhere all the time. Karl Rove comparison vis a vis lying. Yep. White House trying to pin something bad on the intelligence community - Fat Ass. George Tenet took the fall for the administration - Milby. Always looking for a great thanks and great pleasuring, Milbank dug deep for a konspiracy theory that every OlbyLoon would eat up - including the man himself. Milbank postulated that perhaps Fox News received the Usama Bin Laden tape because Olbermann had "just beaten" O'Reilly "in the ratings." Ratings, you say? You mean those Live + Same Day DVR numbers that no one uses? Or was that the time that Olbermann "beat" O'Reilly in the key, coveted all important 15 minute window at the beginning of the show? Which time was that? White House + Fox + O'Reilly = Konspiracy Theorist's dream.

Bring in someone who actually knows what they are talking about to pick up the slack for Monkey Mann. Evan Kohlmann, who was a frequent guest on Fox News until being picked up by MSNBC, rides in to fill in all the gaps in House Boy's knowledge regarding, well, anything. More attempts at trying to pin the closure of Islamic websites on the Bush administration and Fox News. Clearly, to Adam's Apple, Bush and his minions are out to destroy any ability to collect intelligence and my inference from that is that they want to bring about a terrorist attack. Jabba finishes the interview with a cute question about whether or not this really proves once and for all that the administration is really interested in headlines rather than fighting terror. Kohlmann doesn't take the bait, he just says we should be more careful when it comes to matters like this. Great Thanks.

#4: A "milestone" in the 2008 campaign, Rudy Giuliani "roundly" booed at the Yankees game. Giuliani was more concerned with Yankees games spending more time there than Ground Zero - Keith. He was "briefly yet lustily" booed. St. Rudy project as usual. Fred Thompson got three hours of softball questions on "Fox News" [Ding!]. Oralmann makes a pathetic attempt at making Fmr. Sen. Fred Thompson look bad by cherry picking a clip of him saying a number of things are "on the line" but that the "economy is fine." He said the economy is fine but subsequently said that it's on the line. Of course, no context is given on OlbyPlanet to any Republican. They are always dumb. Need further proof? Quote Olby's secret crush Pres. Nixon calling Fred Thompson "dumb" and a finishing touch by der Fuhrer that Sen. Thompson was a "toadie." Of course, what makes him a secret crush is that his out in the open crush, disbarred convicted felon John Dean was Nixon's White House Counsel. Guess where and when the felon got all of his notoriety and knowledge? Nixon White House! How has he put that to use? Bashing "neo cons" and other Republicans! Bring in fair and balanced Chris Matthews. HA! Chris Matthews stunningly smacks down Oralmann. Seriously. SERIOUSLY.

By the way, you gotta be careful about Rudy. You know, Richard Nixon was at the opening of Candlestick in '61 in San Francisco and he watched this horatious booing of the Governor, Pat Brown. I mean, people just destroyed him that night. And ah, Nixon said, "God I can beat that guy," and he ran against him and got killed. So ah, I don't know.

Oralmann doesn't have anything to say to that except that New Yorkers may not like him because "We know what you are doing with 9/11 and we find it a little obscene that you are riding an entire campaign based on this."

Chris Matthews, shocked, replies, "You mean New Yorkers not liking someone for overdoing something?" HA! HA! HA! HA! Matthews goes on to explain what New York epitomizes over doing things. Olby, getting peeved, moves on quickly to Rudy's claim that 23 plots have been foiled. He notes that NOT EVEN THE WHITE HOUSE has claimed 23 plots. Matthews continues to beat on Olby until he, Olby, sputters and stalls. Great thanks (surprising).

Sen. Obama's wife in a car accident.



Oddball: Keith makes a bad Australian accent; kangaroo on a race track. People dressed up as animals. Another bad accent. English - uh, I think.

Best Person in the World: Fred Barnes, Giant Eagle Cashier, Jamie Howard

#3: Threat turned out to be "crap" against the Capitol. Beat up on the updates to the FISA law. Bring in Republican that disagrees with Bush, thus worthy of being on OlbyPlanet - Bruce Fein. Mr. Fein speaks for a while with Hauptmann remaining surprisingly quiet. Nothing really of note here. On to the next story.

#2: Princess Diana inquest.

Keeping Tabs: Der Fuhrer, given his love of Nazism, can't pronounce the German word "Valkyrie" correctly and instead says "Val-keere-ee." Eventually he gets it right after the producer probably corrects him. Nick Nolte has a child.

#1: Larry Craig puppet theater.

In the Media Matters minute, here is a CLEAR example of Oralmann and his lackey's getting material from Blue Blogs. In a story ran in The Hill on October 6th, not until the October 9th show of Der Sturmer did a WPITW nomination appear for Robert Novak as the story was regurgitated on the Talking Points Memo, a website for lefties. Enough said. Runner up, "Comedian" Rush Limbaugh vis a vis ThinkProgress. Shocking. Winner? You guessed it, "Bill-O!" Thanks, DailyKos!, you're always there when I need you. Cue head shakes, calm voice, quiet declaration.



Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's came in at a stellar #13,538 on amazon.com, but "Culture Warrior" is #710. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) The OlbyTome still can't find a rank at Barnes and Noble; O'Reilly's book is #745 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. Monday's Hour of Spin put Olby back in fourth place, but Herr Olbermann was not in and instead Robin took over. Source. Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 1 [LOW]



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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Guest Host: David Shuster

Topics/Guests:

• 2008 ELECTION: Dana Milbank, Washington Post national political reporter; Jonathan Alter, Newsweek
• TORTURE MEMO: Richard Wolffe, Newsweek senior White House correspondent
• LATEST CELEBRITY NEWS: Michael Musto, Village Voice

Working six nights a week? There's the rub.
Krazy Keith said no way, call a sub.
So now Robin is in,
To promote OlbySpin,
Leaving Bathman to soak in his tub.

Special bonus audio clip: John Gibson on Chris Matthews, tomorrow's debate, and of course the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann!

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• SECRET TORTURE: Robert Baer, fmr. CIA officer and time.com columnist
• 2008 ELECTION: Joan Walsh, salon.com editor
• RUSH LIMBAUGH CONTROVERSY: Brandon Friedman, member of VoteVets

Finally the week is over, and what do you know, Keith Oralmann is still pounding the Limbaugh "controversy". (Geez, Bathman. To paraphrase your sidekick The Boy Wonder, why this obsession over Rush? When did a Rush comment ever kill anyone?) How do we know Bush is not lying? Plus the religious right, the sports liar Marion Jones (this portion was clearly edited into the prerecorded spiel later), and more. It's casual Friday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Six and a half years of lies. "Brutal interrogation practices" (like face slapping). Bush (R) "alleged", Rockefeller (D) stated. The language of OlbyPlanet. James Risen of the Times regurgitated the contents of his report. Then when Baer came on the scene they revived The Hour of Spin's torture never works mantra.

Sigh. Olbermoronn has already embarrassed himself on this subject:

'Nuff said.

#4: Fundamentalists may go third party if Rudy wins the nomination. Um, isn't this the same story Olby has already covered this week? Well yeah, but Countdown is more than ever a Xerox machine. New poll sez Hillary is the "least polarizing" candidate. Wow, who do you suppose "suggested" this story to Olbermoronn? Reference to the "far right" [Ding!]. Walsh says Hillary is "warm" and "convincing". Another attack on Rudy and it was on to the ritual Great Thanks.

#3: Shock! Republicans raising money with the Limbaugh flap "on the backs" of soldiers, sermonized Rev Olbermahn. How about votevets raising money with the Limbaugh flap, "on the backs" of soldiers? Not a mention, because Keith Oralmann is a hypocrite and a slovenly political hack. His sock puppet guest: a writer for Daily Kos (Keith's favorite charity), who delights in calling people "chickenhawk" and "draft-dodger" and then complains about name-calling (on-screen graphic: "Chicken Hawk Chutzpah"). Oh and he called GOP fundraising on this issue "deplorable", again without mentioning votevets rundraising on this issue. Reference to the "far right" [Ding!].

After "Fixed Noise" [Ding!] came #2: Olby rhapsodized over Marion Jones, comparing her "extraordinary" speech to that of restroom roamer McGreevey (D). Marion Jones has, of course, proved herself to have been a serial liar for years. So why is Monkeymann sticking up for a congenital liar? Birds of a feather. She was guilty of obstruction of justice. Like Scooter Libby. #1: Oddball and more oddball.

In the Media Matters Minute, Fat Ass attacked the "prejudiced" Glenn Beck (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) and, of course, "Fixed News" [Ding!] (Blue Blog Source: TVNewser). Olbermann repeated a lie from months ago, that Bush "pardoned" Libby. Oh, and Fat Ass also smeared John McCain (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress). Why? He re-used an old joke. Way to go Olby! You would never do that, right? Bill Orally? Comedian Rush Limbaugh. Coultergeist. Fox Noise. Yada yada yada. Man, it's downright scary to contemplate just how much arrogance and how little self-awareness this hockey puck must have!

If it's Friday, it's our weekly assessment of Krazy Keith's masculinity. This week Monkeymann attacked Fox and other broadcasters 31 times. Olby's source (Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) criticized (MS)NBC nine times, but again, Keithy protected his corporate masters with zero criticisms. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -62 [limper than ultra-limp].

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #38,260 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #2,550. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #46,557; O'Reilly's book is #2,019 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Thursday "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann managed to crawl out of his third place hole, but again lost overwhelmingly to his nemesis the eeevil Mr Bill, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]

Should MSNBC choose partisans like Chris Matthews, not to mention the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann, to moderate political debates? Should water carriers for the left be asking the questions, formulating the follow-ups, particularly at a Republican debate? Why does MSLSD put on Democrat debates with Brian Williams and Tim Russert, while the GOP candidates keep getting stuck with Democrat Chris Matthews?

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• SECRET ENDORSEMENT OF TORTURE: John Dean, fmr. Nixon White House counsel and author of "Broken Government"; Neal Katyal, lead attorney in Hamdan v. Rumsfeld and Georgetown Law School
• 2008 ELECTION: Chris Cillizza, washingtonpost.com
• RUSH LIMBAUGH CONTROVERSY: Rachel Maddow, Err America radio host
• POLITICAL INCONSISTENCIES: Alex Borstein, "Family Guy"

Oh joy, felon rehabilitation, attorney for admitted driver of Usama Bin Laden, more "Rush Limbaugh Controversy" with fair and balanced Rachel Maddow of Err America coupled with Keith Love Fest of the most unfunny show on television. Non-sequitor humor is brilliant! Alex Borstein sounds like a political analyst as well. Snooze fest.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• THE BLACKWATER MURDERERS: John Edwards (D),
• WE HAVE A NEW GONZALES-GATE [Ding!]: Dana Milbank
• RUSH LIMBAUGH IS A NASTY PERSON: Brian McGough, Soros puppet

Meet the new Hour of Spin--same as the old Hour of Spin. It was deja vu time as Keith Oralmann bellowed the opening spiel: Iraqi civilian deaths, John Edwards, Leahy goes after the A.G., Bush's "cruelest veto" as he "attacked the health" of children, Rush Limbaugh, Britney Spears... No, this has to be a rerun. We'll liven things up with some dogs that did not bark, and a special audio clip. Everything old is new again on hump day at Olbermann Watch.

#5: Herr Olbermann kicked things off with "breaking news" about Blackwater, accused of "murdering" 17 Iraqi civilians. Herr Olbermann went to Edwards (D), and that reminds us...

Look at The List. Look at the Damn List. The next Edward R Murrow. Right.

Once again Olby pummeled Edwards with probing, tough questions:

• Are troop drawdowns part of your proposal?
• What in your proposal prevents that kind of snake eating its own tail scenario and to keep the government from employing a paramilitary organization like Blackwater?
• Does it seem to you this administration believes all problems should be outsourced, that their mistakes are intended to be a revenue stream for their cronies?
• Hillary Clinton says your criticisms of her are acts of political desperation. How do you respond?
• How do you explain Clinton's growing lead in the polls?

On to "Mister" Bush who, as we heard, "attacked the health" of children. And he eats babies, too. "Mister" Bush is "out of touch" because he wants aid to poor children limited to poor children.

#4: It's GonzalesGate [Ding!] redux! There's a "White House smokescreen". Dana, absent atrocious attire, tossed a little water on Keef's hopes for a big brouhaha, so Merkle called the White House terrorists, and stumbled and stammered a bit before taking refuge in the ritual Great Thanks.

Another plug (what was this, the third? the fourth? maybe the fifth?) for his Big Limbaugh Segment. Geez, Keithy. To paraphrase your pal The Boy Wonder, why this obsession over O'Reilly? When did an O'Reilly comment ever kill someone?

#3: Limbaugh "smeared" an anti-war vet as a "suicide bomber" (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's* Media Matters). A free play of a votevets.org ad. McGough, who starred in the ad, found Rush "repugnant". Olby loved that, because he supports the troops. Or does he? Set the wayback machine for Feb 10, 2007. William Arkin called US troops "mercenaries", said they get "obscene amenities" shipped to them in the war zone, despite all the "rapes and murders" that they commit. How did Edward R Olbermann express his outrage over these insults to our soldiers? Did he run segment after segment, night after night? Did he complain that Arkin had "smeared" our troops? Well, not exactly. So how did Olbermoronn react to these repellent attacks on our soldiers? He agreed with them. Keith Olbermann: hypocritical, slovenly, partisan political hack.

#2: Princess Di, Nicholas Cage, George Grizzard. #1: Britney Spears! In the Media Matters Minute, the Olbsession continued. Olby attacked Mr Bill (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's* Media Matters) and the "lunatic fringe right-wingers at the Fixed News [Ding!] whore-house". Hey Fat Ass, wait a second here. If Rush "smeared" this guy as a "suicide bomber", as you just insisted minutes ago, then didn't you just smear all the women at Fox as prostitutes? Also attacked: Jonah Goldberg (Blue Blog Source: Hillary Clinton's* Media Matters). Hey a reference to "Fixed Noise" [Ding!]. Why don't they just let David Brock do the news on MSLSD and eliminate the Olby middleman?

Dogs That Did Not Bark: Well, we could ask why crack journalist Edward R Olbermann had John Edwards in his Seat of Honor and never asked him about this. (Perhaps it's because he's never reported it in the first place. Surprise.) But let's focus on something else. Krazy Keith has repeatedly blasted US foreign policy re North Korea. It's all the fault of "Mister" Bush because he didn't talk to them. It was Rummy's fault because he benefited from a Clinton engagement policy, but then it was also "Mister" Bush's fault because he did away with that policy. (No, that doesn't make sense, but remember, it's OlbyLogic.) Things were great under Bill Jefferson Clinton, but now we're in a "deep hole". Hell, just come out and say it Merkle. Oh wait, you did, a year ago: our Korean policy is a "failure". Does it surprise anyone that after feeding his meager audience this drivel for months, he spikes this story? What else would one expect from a left wing water carrier?

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #19,935 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #1,726. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #43,270; O'Reilly's book is #2,000 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Tuesday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann lost again to his nemesis the eeevil Mr Bill--who had his biggest audience in three months, both in total viewers and in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Good work, Olby! Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 2 [LOW]

* Why do we call it Hillary Clinton's Media Matters? This is why:

On Monday night's program, the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann named Michael Medved "worst person" (Blue Blog Source: Daily Kos, Keith's favorite charity). Edward R Olbermann claimed that, based on this column, Mr Medved was a defender of slavery.

On the radio Tuesday afternoon, Michael Medved returned fire, with both barrels:

Update: Link to Medved column fixed.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)

Host: Keith Olbermann

Topics/Guests:

• BUSH WANTS TO BOMB BOMB BOMB, BOMB BOMB IRAN: Seymour Hersh, The New Yorker; Richard Wolffe
• 2008 POLITICS: Craig Crawford
• BILL O'REILLY: The flogging continues.

He's tanned (of course!), rested, and ready, as Keith Oralmann bellows the opening spiel: White House "warmongers" want to bomb Iran, Sy Hersh, "ultra-conservatives" revolt against Rudy, Britney Spears, and--could there by any doubt?--O'Reilly yet again. This is a new show, right? Oh well, it's Blue Monday at Olbermann Watch.

#5: "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann kicked things off with Bush wanting to go to war with Iran. "It's more sable-rattling", claimed the smooth-talking baseball card collector. Reference to "neocons" [Ding!]. Olby fixation on the non-binding sense-of-the-Senate resolution about the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. How dare the Senate call them terrorists! Sy said it's all part of the "campaign". Olbermannijad said there is no compelling evidence that Iran is developing nuclear weapons, or that any of their military are involved in terrorism. Once more Keith defends Iran. We ask again, is this a new show? Great thanks.

Next up, Richard Wolffe. Man, it's deja vu all over again. Well maybe not. Here's a great example of how no matter what anybody says, Herr Olbermann sticks to his talking points like glue:

WOLFFE MAN: This time around there is no Presidential determination, there is no decision. What you have is a diplomatic track, you have obviously a lot of drumbeats a lot of saber-rattling, but I think we are still some way off that decision....
OLBERMORONN: Is there no diplomatic track because there is no intention of having one?...
WOLFFE MAN: Well the diplomatic track is quite serious right now.

That's Edward R Olbermahn, great journalist, and a hell of a listener! Wolffie, for exposing again how the host of The Hour of Spin is monomaniacal hack: Great Thanks!

After another O'Reilly attack we got #4: Project Rudy resumes. Christian "extremists" might go third party. Olbermann's Brain chortled about a Rudy "backlash", but doubted a third party nomination would happen. Then Olby was off to ridicule Fred Thompson, and Brain sniggered along. Switching to the Dems, Mr Merkle talked about all the money they made, and why Obama won't win just because he has the most moolah. (Hill sends her appreciation.) Great thanks.

Another O'Reilly attack, and then yet another O'Reilly attack led to #3: Still on top of that yet another O'Reilly attack! Yeah this is the same story as before. Because Olby insisted this would be Bill's "waterloo", and since it ain't happening, then why not flog the story for yet another day? This was a supposed-to-be-funny comedy bit with Olby playing someone being interviewed by an O'Reilly producer. References: "falafel" [Ding!], Olby's lie about Malmedy [Ding!], Andrea Mackris [Ding!], Fox Noise [Ding!], loofahs [Ding!], Malmedy again [Ding!], Mackris again [Ding!], loofahs again [Ding!]. Has Bill O'Reilly ever mentioned KarmaBites? Or Merlot? Or Keith's being hung like a thumbtack? No, but all Monkeymann knows how to do is make personal attacks, in fact the same personal attacks he has made over and over. (This is a new show, right?) Attn Dan Abrams: get a copy of this tape off to the Emmy committee immediately. The Pulitzer people will want to see it too.

After a "Fixed News" [Ding!] reference, it was on to #2: Fatal airport arrest (regurgitated video), Keith Urban, Mylee Cyrus, . #1: Britney Spears! In the Media Matters Minute, Dana Perino (R): this had something to do with Burma but the upshot of it is that Olbermannijad concluded that the prisoners in Gitmo are "very innocent". No we're not making this up. Bathtub Boy had to make an equivalence between betraying your country and a leader betraying his underlings, so he attacked "Fixed News" [Ding!] Col David Hunt (Blue Blog Source: Think Progress). Hey Keith, tell us about your service record. Oh that's right, you can't even drive a car. Worst, courtesy of some cherry-picked incomplete quotes: Michael Medved (Blue Blog Source: Daily Kos).

Olbermann's book The book that bears Olbermann's name sunk to #23,248 on amazon, while "Culture Warrior" is #2,639. (It's that 2-for-$25 sale!) Barnes & Noble lists the OlbyTome at #39,743; O'Reilly's book is #2,001 there, and is one of the top five books of 2006 per Publishers Weekly. On Friday the infamous, deplorable Keith Olbermann could do no better than a third place finish in the coveted, pivotal, much-beloved, critical, all-important "key demo". Harrrrr!