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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith Olbermann
Apparently, even Valentine's Day and all its deserved disdain was not devoid of a Keith Speshul Komment. I guess he was fresh out of Merlot for Ms. Tur. Thus, relegated to a night of preaching to Kos Kiddies, he served up the usual fodder. Keith has seemingly jumped ship to the Obama campaign, though he was happy to tout numbers suggesting Mrs. Clinton was ahead in PA and OH. The new Clinton catchword: solutions! Hawk it, Olby! Supposed McCain flip-flop on waterboarding (no more St. Rudy to beat on). Democrats "call the President's bluff." Apparently, the President is "terrorizing" the people of the United States especially since he might postpone his trip to Africa. Gasp! Fear mongering I detect! Horrors! Keith "no longer fears" the President. He should worry that his ratings will collapse when he can only scream about how the Democrats are not far left enough if the Democrats run Capitol Hill.
#5: Demonstrating some loyalty, Herr Olbermann touts Mrs. Clinton's slim win in New Mexico. But he doesn't neglect to remind us of her financial woes. Shockingly, "solutions" is also the keyword of Mr. Bill Clinton on the stump. Olby touts Mrs. Clinton's leads in Ohio and Pennsylvania, while quickly noting those leads have diminished. Keith, ever absorbed with himself and attempting to pretend he has no "horse in this race" has the "Keith Number" which is the number of undecideds. Free air time to Sen. Obama's campaign ad. Howie Fineman came in to shore up the idea that the "solutions" catchphrase is just that. Nothing terribly relevant or exciting here. Regurgitating Mrs. Clinton's former slogans. More beating on her and her campaign woes. I guess Der Fuhrer goes with the presumptive (D) Nominee. Howie doesn't seem to have any love for Hillary. MSNBC has surely been hating on that campaign that "pimps" out people. Great thanks.
Keith nearly wets himself telling the story that "Weak Linc" Chafee (R-supposedly-RI) former Senator is supporting Sen. Obama. Bring in Milby without any extravagant apparel. Cue weird jokes about "experimenting" and other pseudo homosexual remarks about a former Bush campaign manager who might resign from the McCain campaign because of some connection with Obama. Fat Ass tries to play best friend to both sides by giving each (D) candidate a bone. NEXT.
#4: Apparently, the "Straight Talk Express" no longer lives up to Fat Ass' standards. Sen. McCain now "endorses torture" because he voted against a resolution banning waterboarding despite the fact the Senator stated that his vote was based on the fact that the amendment in and of itself was unnecessary because the law already prohibited waterboarding. Irrelevant on Olbyplanet, whatever DailyKos says (Daily Kos's very own Keith Olbermann, mind you) must be true. Sen. McCain clearly endorses "torture." Mind you, three people at max have been waterboarded. St. Rudy is clearly no longer the priority for Jabba and his lackeys. Welcome MSNBC "political analyst" from far left Err America Radio who is very analytical as long as it's about the "Republican smear machine" or other such unbiased comments. Keith would prefer "Mister" Bush to say that he's resigning. Ms. Maddow's "analysis" is clearly unbiased and definitely not slanted towards Democrats. McCain supposedly flip flops a lot. Great thanks.
#3: Usual whining about the declared "illegality" by Keith "Chicken and Waffles" Olbermann of "eavesdropping" and violation of my "civil liberties." Republicans engage in "cheesy political theater" unlike the Democrats who cared more about dopey "contempt of congress" bills rather than the important FISA bill. Speshul Komment time. Recap at the bottom.
#2: In the Media Matters minute, the usual suspects for Olbersturmfuhrer and his lackeys. "Coultergeist" for referring to Barack Obama as "President Hussein" through the usual smear channel at Media Matters. Media Matters was in full force tonight, as Lauren Ingraham got the silver award. Two conservatives, shocking! Tom Sullivan, of "Fixed News Radio" [Ding!] in a Media Matters trifecta. Conservatives and Fox, what else would there be?
#1: Richard Lewis. Whatever. More lefty whining that matters not.
Tonight's MisterMeter reading: 8 [HIGH] This, the 649th day since the declaration that "Karl Rove will be indicted."
APPENDIX: Keith's Latest Speshul Education Komment
A part of what I will say, was said here on Jan. 31. Unfortunately it is both sadder and truer now than it was then.
“Who’s to blame?” Mr. Bush also said this afternoon, “Look, these folks in Congress passed a good bill late last summer.... The problem is, they let the bill expire. My attitude is: If the bill was good enough then, why not pass the bill again?”
Like the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution. Or Executive Order 90-66. Or The Alien and Sedition Acts. Or slavery.
Mr. Bush, you say that our ability to track terrorist threats will be weakened and our citizens will be in greater danger. Yet you have weakened that ability!
You have subjected us, your citizens, to that greater danger! This, Mr. Bush, is simple enough for even you to understand.
For the moment, at least, thanks to some true patriots in the House, and your own stubbornness, you have tabled telecom immunity, and the FISA act.
You. By your own terms and your definitions, you have just sided with the terrorists. You’ve got to have this law, or we’re all going to die. But, practically speaking, you vetoed this law.
It is bad enough, sir, that you were demanding an ex post facto law that could still clear the AT&Ts and the Verizons from responsibility for their systematic, aggressive and blatant collaboration with your illegal and unjustified spying on Americans under this flimsy guise of looking for any terrorists who are stupid enough to make a collect call or send a mass e-mail.
But when you demanded it again during the State of the Union address, you wouldn’t even confirm that they actually did anything for which they deserved to be cleared.
“The Congress must pass liability protection for companies believed to have assisted in the efforts to defend America.”
Believed? Don’t you know? Don’t you even have the guts Dick Cheney showed in admitting they did collaborate with you? Does this endless presidency of loopholes and fine print extend even here? If you believe in the seamless mutuality of government and big business, come out and say it! There is a dictionary definition, one word that describes that toxic blend.
You’re a fascist — get them to print you a T-shirt with fascist on it! What else is this but fascism? Did you see Mark Klein on this newscast last November?
Mark Klein was the AT&T whistleblower who explained in the placid, dull terms of your local neighborhood IT desk how he personally attached all AT&T circuits, everything, carrying every one of your phone calls, every one of your e-mails, every bit of your Web browsing into a secure room, room No. 641-A at the Folsom Street facility in San Francisco, where it was all copied so the government could look at it.
Not some of it, not just the international part of it, certainly not just the stuff some spy, a spy both patriotic and telepathic, might be able to divine had been sent or spoken by or to a terrorist.
Everything! Every time you looked at a naked picture. Every time you bid on eBay. Every time you phoned in a donation to a Democrat. “My thought was,” Mr. Klein told us last November, “George Orwell’s ‘1984.’ And here I am, forced to connect the Big Brother machine.”
And if there’s one thing we know about Big Brother, Mr. Bush, it is that he is — you are — a liar.
“This Saturday at midnight,” you said Thursday, “legislation authorizing intelligence professionals to quickly and effectively monitor terrorist communications will expire. If Congress does not act by that time, our ability to find out who the terrorists are talking to, what they are saying and what they are planning will be compromised.” You said that “the lives of countless Americans depend” on your getting your way.
This is crap. And you sling it with an audacity and a speed unrivaled by even the greatest political felons of our history.
Richard Clarke — you might remember him, sir: He was one of the counterterror pros you inherited from President Clinton, before you ran the professionals out of government in favor of your unreality-based reality — Richard Clarke wrote in the Philadelphia Inquirer:
“Let me be clear: Our ability to track and monitor terrorists overseas would not cease should the Protect America Act expire.
“If this were true, the president would not threaten to terminate any temporary extension with his veto pen. All surveillance currently occurring would continue even after legislative provisions lapsed because authorizations issued under the act are in effect up to a full year.”
You are a liar, Mr. Bush. And after showing some skill at it, you have ceased to even be a very good liar.
And your minions like John Boehner, your Republican congressional crash dummies who just happen to decide to walk out of Congress when a podium-full of microphones await them, they should just keep walking, out of Congress and, if possible, out of the country.
For they and you, sir, have no place in a government of the people, by the people, for the people.
The lot of you are the symbolic descendants of the despotic middle managers of some banana republic to whom “freedom” is an ironic brand name, a word you reach for when you want to get away with its opposite.
Thus, Mr. Bush, your panoramic invasion of privacy is dressed up as “protecting America.”
Thus, Mr. Bush, your indiscriminate domestic spying becomes the focused monitoring only of “terrorist communications.”
Thus, Mr. Bush, what you and the telecom giants have done isn’t unlawful; it’s just the kind of perfectly legal, passionately patriotic thing for which you happen to need immunity!
Richard Clarke is on the money, as usual.
That the president was willing to veto this eavesdropping means there is no threat to the legitimate counterterror efforts under way.
As Sen. Edward Kennedy reminded us in December: “The president has said that American lives will be sacrificed if Congress does not change FISA."
“But he has also said that he will veto any FISA bill that does not grant retroactive immunity.
“No immunity, no FISA bill. So if we take the president at his word, he’s willing to let Americans die to protect the phone companies.”
And that literally cannot be. Even Mr. Bush could not overtly take a step that actually aids the terrorists. I am not talking about ethics here. I am talking about blame. If the president seems to be throwing the baby out with the bath water, it means we can safely conclude there is no baby.
Because if there were, sir, now that you have vetoed an extension of this eavesdropping, if some terrorist attack were to follow, you would not merely be guilty of siding with the terrorists. You would not merely be guilty of prioritizing the telecoms over the people. You would not merely be guilty of stupidity. You would not merely be guilty of treason, sir.
You would be personally, and eternally, responsible.
And if there is one thing we know about you, Mr. Bush, one thing that you have proved time and time again — it is that you are never responsible.
As recently ago as 2006, we spoke words like these with trepidation.
The idea that even the most cynical and untrustworthy of politicians in our history, George W. Bush, would use the literal form of terrorism against his own people was dangerous territory. It seemed to tempt fate, to heighten fear.
We will not fear any longer. We will not fear the international terrorists, and we will thwart them. We will not fear the recognition of the manipulation of our yearning for safety, and we will call it what it is: terrorism. We will not fear identifying the vulgar hypocrites in our government, and we will name them. And we will not fear George W. Bush. Nor will we fear because George W. Bush wants us to fear.