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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith "Czechoslovakia" Olbermann
The spin started with the opening spiel: can Obama get his message out in the face of the Republican "wall of noise"? Oh, and we got the first lie of the night: Palin's "claim" that she sold her plane on ebay. Of course she said no such thing, but it's never too early for Another Olbermann Lie, and the opening spiel is a traditional spot for the first one of the night. In fact, as you will see, we get to three OlbyLies in just three minutes. So settle back, it's a Blue Monday on The Hour of Spin, starring the demoted ex-anchorman Keith "Man on Fan" Olbermann!
Those wascally Wepublicans repeat daily "out and out lies", such as the claim that Palin "has always been against" the Bridge to Nowhere. Man, just two minutes into the show and we have another Olbermann lie!. That's not what she said. Brief mention of polls (McCain gained "a point or two"), and zero mention of that definitive, all-important, critical, much-respected Gallup likely voters poll. You know, the one Edward R Olbermann shouted over Joe Scarborough to trumpet when McCain lost a few points. Today McCain is up ten points in that poll, but of course Herr Olbermann made no mention of it. Because he's a slovenly political hack.
Oralmann goes on to cite that phony "lie", claiming that the new McCain ad repeats the claim that Palin has "always been against" the bridge. Three minutes in, we have the Third Olbermann Lie. The ad makes no such claim! In tribute to Oralmann we should say this is the Third Olbermann Out-And-Out Lie.
Then the blue dress interview, where as usual Edward R Olbermann's penetrating questions are so much more interesting than the stammering answers. (Of course, do not fail to check out the newly-updated edition of The List!) So we will run down the tough interrogatories that KO pummeled Obama with:
Olbermann interviews Obama by checking off each talking point and giving Obama about 3 or more uninterrupted minutes to give his speech, uh, answer.
#3: Palin lies. And she repeats her lies again and again. Fat Ass picks up a Palin "mistake" about Fannie/Freddie (Blue Blog Source: Huffington Post) that wasn't a mistake at all. Earth to Oralmann: they are too expensive to the taxpayers, because the taxpayers are having to bail them out! How stupid is this guy anyhow?
As Olby chuckles about how she doesn't understand the mortgage crisis, we are supposed to forget how Obama had to correct Bathtub Boy just minutes earlier. Then Olby claimed that Palin announced to the GOP convention that she had "sold the plane on ebay". Olbermann Out-and-Out Lie #4. That's not what she said. Enough of this segment. The Olbermann Lies are coming too thick and too fast.
Somewhere in there Krazy Keith tossed in a few grenades at Hannity and "lunatic right-wing radio host" [Ding!] "psychotic" Mark Levin (mispronounced twice--gotta love that sportscaster training).
#1 meant more time for Palin attacks. This time the target was her religion. How dare she pray? After all, on OlbyPlanet, they don't pray. They prey. After an improper use of the phrase "begs the question" (again, that sportscaster training is invaluable to a broadcaster), Edward R Olbermann went and read the same text two or three times, asking, duh?!?, is my microphone open? No, but your yap is. Over and over.
That led into a bash-Sarah session with Rachel Madcow, to plug her upcoming show. You know like he always did with Dan Abrams. Oh, what's that. He didn't? Oh that's right. Palin's "Elmer Gantry", don't you know! Because mocking someone's religion is in the fine tradition of Edward R Murrow. And Keithy is the next Edward R Murrow. Just ask his ego.
Speaking of prayers, FatAss: I prayed that NBC would kick you and The Drooler off the anchor desk during political coverage. God answered my prayers. I wonder what else I could pray for...hmmm.....
Olberathiest passes the baton to Mister Madcow with a segway trashing God. No wonder no one watches (MS)NBC.
In the Media Matters Minute, Keith Oralmann proved yet again why we call him Rip 'n Read. Keith "Man on Fan" Olbermann dished out O'Reilly Attack #508, falling in line with Cynthia Tucker of The Atlanta Journal-Constitution (coming to her aide in the process) and Jon Stewart of "The Daily Show," all of whom had the blue blog source for which this segment is named: Media Matters. We'll get to the attack momentarily. First, came two other unfortunate victims.
Worse was Fox NFL color analyst Brian Baldinger. Yes, Chicken and Waffles is now attacking his "Football Night in America" competition. Why? Well, while complimenting Michael Strahan (on the pregame show, I assume), he made a reference to Sarah Palin. Horrors of horrors! Snarky comeback time: "I thought it was some other idiot on some other network who was going to bring the Presidential race where it didn't belong..." Yes, Fat Ass, that makes up for Russell Brand at last night's MTV Video Music Awards. That's such a valid comparison. (I can be snarky and sarcastic, too.) With a curled lip and sneer, he finished his sentence: "...on to the *football* broadcasts." Now, comes the papers in hand: "Actually, this one is a twofer. Michael Strahan is no Dan Patrick." Well...no. Strahan is an in-studio analyst; Patrick narrates highlights. So, obviously he "is no Dan Patrick," but that doesn't diminish him. And, of course, Michael Strahan is a Super Bowl champion, and he has the ring to prove it. I digress.
Worser was Chris Wallace. Fixed News! [ding!] "Be careful with those sweeping declarative statements, Chrissy!" Also, "Wally"! Dumb guy voice for Wallace; mock voice for McCain as Keithy plays Gotcha!, quoting a "Meet the Press" appearance in early 2007. "So, Chris, Senator McCain was doubting about the surge before he was for it, before he took credit for it. Those Talking Points [ding!] don't come with footnotes, do they?" We could ask the same of Olbermoronn.
Worst was the aforementioned O'Reilly Attack #508. Rip 'n Read joined the far-left chorus of calling Mr. Bill a hypocrite because he was not critical of Gov. Sarah Palin's 17-year-old daughter's pregnancy, but *was* of the Spears parents when Jamie Lynn was pregnant. Again, with sarcasm, that's such a valid comparison. Last Tuesday's Talking Points Memo that Brock and Co. distorted can be found here *undistorted*:
Billo the Clown! [ding!] "The pattern has now emerged: criticize him in a newspaper, and he'll send out..." He went on to attack Jesse Watters and Porter Berry. Stalker producers! [ding!] "Latest victim: Pulitzer Prize winning Cynthia Tucker of The Atlanta Journal-Constitution. She had the nerve to remind her readers that on the occasion of previous teen pregnancy in the news, Billo [ding!] followed the Talking Points [ding!]. Just as comedian [ding!] Rush Limbaugh immediately announced of the bun in the Jamie Lynn Spears oven. Quote [ding!]..." Yes, the ol' Ted Baxter voice made its return, quoting what Media Matters put out: video of a December Pinheads and Patriots segment in which the Spears parents were the Pinheads for the night. Harry Reasoner would be so proud of Edward R. Olbermann trotting that out attack after attack. "17-year-old daughter of a political figure gets pregnant, announces she's gonna marry the father, *out of bounds* as a story for analysis, something with which I entirely concur." Is he kidding? "*But*!...16-year-old television actress gets pregnant, announces *she's* gonna marry the father, a field day for naked, flabby hypocrites like...Billo the Clown [ding!] Today's...I'm sorry about the naked and flabby part..." Too late. "...Worst...Person...in the Worrrrrlduh!"
Of course what Keith was doing here was brilliantly subtle. He was equating Palin with Mother Spears, and Jamie Lynn with Palin's daughter. Because, you know, same parenting, same supervision, same warning signs, same everything. And any time Krazy Legs can try to make people think Palin's daughter has a history of unsupervised recklessness equivalent to that of Jamie Lynn Spears, and attack O'Reilly at the same time--hey, that's a twofer on OlbyPlanet. Besides, Olbsessions never get old.
So, now he's using his stupid show to attack his competitors on the sports side? Jeez, the world certainly revolves around you, Keith.
"I'm the breaking news guy" he spews
Mister Olbermahn, we have some news
It's duly noted
You've been demoted
David Gregory's in and you lose.
And that's The Hour of Spin for this, the 856th day since the declaration that "Karl Rove will in fact be indicted".
Great thanks to our OlbyWatch recappers who contributed!