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"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN" (8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. ET)
Host: Keith "Czechoslovakia" Olbermann
UPDATED: See after the jump. We expose Another Olbermann Lie used to--you guessed it--smear Sarah Palin.
Incredibly, the lead story in the opening spiel? McCain said "FEC" instead of "SEC". Wow. "57 states" never got that kind of coverage on OlbyPlanet. In fact it never got any coverage on OlbyPlanet. Plus the spiel had Olby repeat his old lie about the Special Olympics budget, and that was just the beginning. Before the hour was over, Bathtub Boy would reiterate a whole fistfull of lies about Palin, and even lie about one of his own guests! Hey, Merkle. It's a Friday night. Don't you have better things to do? What about Katy? While you're bloviating and lying on The Hour of Spin, what's she supposed to do? Stay home alone and watch tv? On a Friday night? Oh wait, maybe not...
Ashleigh Banfield wants her glasses back.
This is KO's tongue-tied meme brain on "McCain in the Membrane." Low Blow KO: "Welcome to the Big Leagues, Gov. It maaaaa...uh..moves pretty fast out here. You might want to get your head in the game." [Quick out] Good advice, eh?
If sheep go "baaaaa," What animal goes "maaaaa?"
UPDATE: Olbermoronn is such a disgusting hack liar. He's clearly developed a pattern for Palin smears: attack Sarah for something she never said. Here's a classic example:
OLBERMANN: Governor Palin again at Cedar Rapids: "As Alaska's Governor, I put the government's checkbook on line so that people can see where their money's going." She then said if she were elected she'd put the federal checkbook on line as if it were her own idea. It's a great idea. Such a great idea in fact that the American checkbook is already on line....
Another Olbermann Lie! Why did Olby quote her word for word in one sentence, and then switch to "she said" paraphrase for the next sentence? Because the next sentence was a lie. Compare Oralmann's version to her actual words:
PALIN: For instance, as Alaska's governor, I put the government's checkbook online so that people can see where their money's going. We'll bring that kind of transparency, that responsibility, and accountability back. We're going to bring that back to D.C.
Palin never said anything about putting the federal checkbook on line. She didn't even mention the federal checkbook! Olbermann lied to make her look bad. This smear was lifted from Bathtub Boy's favorite blue blog source: his own blog. But it wasn't his only lie built on attacking Palin for something she didn't say.
Consider the other Palin smear introduced tonight in the spiel: that "Palin's pastor" went on literal witch-hunts in Kenya, and that's outrageous (way worse than Jeremiah Wright) because Palin "credited him" with "helping her become governor". Sigh. This is soooo tiresome but it must be done. 1. He wasn't Palin's pastor. He was a guest speaker at the church. B. It couldn't be worse than Rev Wright because Palin didn't name a book after one of his sermons, never attended his church, and certainly didn't do so for 20 years. III. What do pastors matter anyhow? Oralmann never said a word about Jeremiah Wright until Obama denounced him. That means Fat Ass was--what?--about two weeks behind the news curve. 4. The best part of all: Palin never said he helped her become governor. That part was Another Olbermann Lie. Where did he get it from? He made it up! Well, he made it up after reading it on his own blue blog (Daily Kos).
But Oralmann was desperate to bring on some "authority" to spread this latest smear, so he returned once again to Shannyn Moore. The last time we saw her on The Hour of Spin, she was a talk show host on Alaska Progressive Radio. Not tonight. Oh no, Edward R Olbermahn tonied up her resume in just a few days' time. Tonight, she was Shannyn Moore, "Alaskan journalist"! How do obscure radio entertainers get to become "journalists"? King Olbermahn decrees it so. Of course, everywhere else but on OlbyPlanet that would be called a lie. Because there's nothing whatsoever in her resume that speaks to any kind of journalistic training or even experience. C'mon Olby, how could she be a "journalist"? She never had the bestest bubblegum card collection on the block!
In the Media Matters Minute, Rush, Rupe, and an anonymous sad face. Let's knock them down in order.
Worse was Rush Limbaugh. Comedian! [Ding!] KeithO the Klown tried his most distorted Rush impression, sounding like he was eating while talking. "That's all he had," Fat Ass gleefully replied to Rush's statement (at least what was read from a blue blog) that "Obama thugs" hacked Sarah Palin's e-mail account without naming names. Sarcasm and raised hands abound in the following: "Why not Bill Ayers?! I bet it was Bill Ayers who done it! I mean, seriously, 46 days to go yet, Rush, and you've just give up?!"
Worser was Rupert Murdoch (again?). Ha-ha! His daughter, Prudence Murdoch MacLeod, admits in a new book by Michael Wolff that her father dyes his hair! Ha! That freaking loser, eh, Bathtub Boy? It's Talk Like a Pirate Day, meaning that voice of voices was trotted out to read a quote of Prudence in that book. But this time, it sounded like a down under Edith Bunker. To that, I say "Stifle, Keith! Stifle!" Back on OlbyPlanet, at the conclusion of the reading, Olby coughs and gives a "thank you" wave. [What's worse: to die your hair or to wear a hideous rug? ==J$]
Worst was...Who the hell cares when the picture involves a sad face over an anonymous person? Something about the guy getting lap dances in his office and he used to be head of DeKalb County Bar Association...or something. I don't care.
Make it a great weekend.
Help me out here, folks. I'm just trying to wrap by brain around the awarding of the Bronze Medal. Let's do a recap of events:
Remember when Oralmann & Co spent an entire hour hyperventilating about some schlub who sneaked a peek at Obama's passport file? And how it turned out that it wasn't just Obama but a bunch of celebrities? And no information was compromised and made public? Now, after the Palin email hack has been news three days, Merkle finally can claim he "covered" it because of a tangential mention in an attack on somebody with a much larger audience than his. "Journalism" on OlbyPlanet.
Baghdad and the RNC
Two places where Olby won't be
He's an expert on war
An Obama whore
And replaced by Dave Gregory
If it's Friday, it's our weekly assessment of Krazy Keith's masculinity. This week, Monkeymann attacked Fox and other broadcasters 26 times. Olby's source (Hillary Clinton's Media Matters) criticized (MS)NBC 9 times, but Keithy protected his corporate masters with zero criticisms. That makes this week's Olbermann Manhood Quotient: -70 [Musto limp].
And that's The Hour of Spin for this, the 867th day since the declaration that "Karl Rove will in fact be indicted". Great thanks to our OlbyWatch recappers who did such an assiduously good job tonight with a thoroughly thankless task!